Don’t want to be alone, lonely

[KangarooKenny]

So I need to end my marriage. I’ve known it for a couple of years. We are house mates. But I can’t do it, I don’t want another relationship, but I don’t want to be alone.
He drinks a bottle of wine a night, we haven’t had sex for a couple of years, separate bedrooms, don’t do anything together.
Why can’t I do it ? Why doesn’t he do it ?

Posting with some links. Hope they help Also saw you commented kindly on another post :)
www.mind.org.uk/information-support/tips-for-everyday-living/loneliness/tips-to-manage-loneliness/
www.mind.org.uk/information-support/tips-for-everyday-living/loneliness/about-loneliness/

But you sound alone.

Only stuck so you can't change anything.

if you aren't going to leave him and he won; tleave you, then you need to improve the life you have together.

Maybe you should start by sitting him down and asking him what if anything he wants from this marriage and your life together.
What did you hope it would be at the outset? Why has that not happened?

You could also start attending Al-Anon support group for partners of people who are alcohl dependent.

Do you have children together? Whats the financial and housing situation?

Can you articulate why you feel you don't want to be alone? Because you could make plans and put things in place to fill those needs. EG "I want someone I can go out for meals with, have a moan to about work, go on holiday with" - all those could be fulfilled by strengthening your friendships (or making new ones.)

There is nothing lonelier than being alone within a relationship.

Good advice! :)
@EvenMoreFuriousVexation
Can you articulate why you feel you don't want to be alone? Because you could make plans and put things in place to fill those needs. EG "I want someone I can go out for meals with, have a moan to about work, go on holiday with" - all those could be fulfilled by strengthening your friendships (or making new ones.)

There is nothing lonelier than being alone within a relationship.

I've been a single parent to one child for 13 years. Being lonely with someone is far worse than being alone.

When you end your relationship, fill your evenings with events and surround yourself with people, eventually friendships will form.

If you are lonely when alone at home put the radio or BBC sounds on a comedy show to decrease the silence. Get a cat they are fantastic company but more independent than a dog. I got DD a cat but actually having the cat sat on my lap when she was in bed was far more companiable than I thought it would be.

I was in a similar position but we weren't married. The fact of it is, we could have carried on this forever but he wasn't giving my the elements of a relationship that was important to me. In September I ended it but we are extremely amicable and I feel confident that we will continue a friendship which is all it was really, after all.

By us ending it it leaves it open for us to meet someone else who does tick the boxes that are important to us.