Aibu

[whatisavalidusername]

Hey everyone, I've just joined in the sole purpose of asking this question. Am I the arsehole?
My partner of 20yrs has been out of work for 3-4months for context we both worked full time on an average wage, and since my partners job ended all the financial stability is on me, I have no spare money and we have a lot of outgoings, I have to rob Peter to pay Paul so to speak,
I paid for all of outgoings with my wage and my partner paid for all the extras we wanted.
But since his unemployment I'm having to pay his car finance as well as my own Also everything else ... his extras, I.e he likes a drink and smokes so I'm paying for that.
We also have a camper van that is old and I see it as our thing no one else's so I'm getting annoyed that he's running people around to do their jobs while sometimes ours are ignored,
And I mean taking someone that lives 300--500ft to a shop on the daily just to earn a fiver or tenner.
My argument is, it's an old van 30yrs and it shouldn't be used to run people about on short journeys. Not only that but i thought it was our Space and I hate the thought of anyone and everyone being in there, not only that but the wear and tear is happening I.e he's had to have the 5th gear fixed twice in the last year, which I think is all the running around he's doing. Please be as brutally honest with me as you can
And if more context is needed then please ask away. Thanks in advance

I understand your perspectives, all the best op

Are you married?

No we are not Married

After twenty years, I wouldn’t begrudge supporting my partner through unemployment for a few months. It would of course be on the proviso they were looking for whorl of course. I don’t really understand the issue about the van, it seem she is being paid to give lifts.

Thanks for the reply
, my issue isn't about supporting him although it is a pressure, I guess I just hate the fact of other people being in what I thought was our special place and the fact that it's getting run to the ground.

That's not how vehicle transmission works.
But on topic, you've got far bigger issues than what he uses the camper for (also it's actually good for vehicles to be driven regularly so he's doing you a favour there).
The main issue is he's a cocklodger.
He needs to get a job and find some direction.

Really ? I thought short journeys put more tension on engines, I.e stop starting and all that.

I guess if I'm really honest I'm probably jealous that he gets to just do what he likes and I have to work to pay all the commitments we have

And I honestly do hate it when someone other than ourselves are in the campervan I think of it as our space. Perhaps it is me being unreasonable thanks for your replies everyone I'll take it on board 👍🏻