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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Not copinh

10 replies

petal234 · 14/10/2022 19:34

Il really not coping and need someone to tell me things will get better and I’ll be ok

Due to severe untreated mental health issues my daughters dad has took custody. My partner who lives next door also just broke up with me. I’ve been waiting for therapy a year. I had a huge breakdown yesterday and my friends called me selfish and have abandoned me

i miss my daughter and ex so much and I don’t know what to do I’m struggling to keep safe and I really can’t see a way out of this darkness

OP posts:
User1014 · 14/10/2022 23:17

First of all, I am so sorry you are going through this.

Secondly, those "friends" are not your friends if they are going to treat you like that.

Do you have anyone else in your life you can trust or speak to?

The fact that you acknowledge that you are struggling and need help is a great first step. Could you maybe get therapy privately to speed up the process?

It WILL get better. I know it doesn't feel like it now but the fact that you WANT to get better is amazing.

Take time to just focus on yourself. Look after yourself. Exercise is absolutely fantastic for mental health. Go for a walk, join a gym, go to a dance class, join a sports group, anything to get moving and potentially meet new people. Create the version of yourself that you and your daughter will be proud of.

Lotsofgin · 14/10/2022 23:48

It will get better, I promise. Just hang in there.
It doesn't feel like it now but it will.

toogoodforthisworld · 15/10/2022 00:37

Are you allowed to see your daughter. Can you ask your ex to arrange it?
Hang on in there xxx

Original poster
petal234 · 15/10/2022 10:01

User1014 · 14/10/2022 23:17

First of all, I am so sorry you are going through this.

Secondly, those "friends" are not your friends if they are going to treat you like that.

Do you have anyone else in your life you can trust or speak to?

The fact that you acknowledge that you are struggling and need help is a great first step. Could you maybe get therapy privately to speed up the process?

It WILL get better. I know it doesn't feel like it now but the fact that you WANT to get better is amazing.

Take time to just focus on yourself. Look after yourself. Exercise is absolutely fantastic for mental health. Go for a walk, join a gym, go to a dance class, join a sports group, anything to get moving and potentially meet new people. Create the version of yourself that you and your daughter will be proud of.

Ive literally got nobody. And I can’t afford therapy but I’m going to do what I can to get myself through this myself. I’m attending a drop in on Monday to try and get some help

OP posts:
Original poster
petal234 · 15/10/2022 10:01

Lotsofgin · 14/10/2022 23:48

It will get better, I promise. Just hang in there.
It doesn't feel like it now but it will.

Im trying so hard but the pain in my life is constant there’s always something and I just don’t know how to handle it anymore

OP posts:
Original poster
petal234 · 15/10/2022 10:03

I get to every other weekend I have her this weekend trying so blooming hard to pull myself together but I know I need help. I can’t cope with the way I’m feeling 😭😭

OP posts:
layladomino · 15/10/2022 13:03

Are you getting as much support as possible through your GP and local MH support services?

Original poster
petal234 · 15/10/2022 17:33

layladomino · 15/10/2022 13:03

Are you getting as much support as possible through your GP and local MH support services?

I went back yesterday and got referred to a social prescribing team to help the loneliness and was given diazepam but I still have to wait for therapy there’s a centre a short bus ride away who can do drop in councelling so I’m going when they open Monday irs just getting through it until then. Gp and local mh team seem to palm me off with tranquillisers and months of referrals. I literally tried to take my life 4 months ago and they have done barely anything

OP posts:
User1014 · 15/10/2022 22:38

I hope you're feeling a bit better today and I'm glad to hear that you get to see your daughter every other weekend.

Let your daughter be your reason for getting through this. Just think of how proud she will be when you come out of this the other side, stronger and better than ever.

Definitely go to those drop ins and make those small steps towards getting better.

t1lly · 15/10/2022 23:17

I hope you're doing ok today. Just wanted to say you sound like you're really taking control as much as you can by asking for help, even by coming on here and looking for support, it's impressive💪. Sorry if the NHS help so far is not what it should be, but keeping pushing, please tell any professional you meet how much you need help.
Maybe try to go out for a walk in the sun (or whatever the weather is doing!) tomorrow with your daughter? And what about calling Samaritans for a friendly, sympathetic voice to speak to?
You can do this xx

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