I don't want to drip feed but I also don't want to overload, I'll try to keep it simple.
Last year things got very tricky between me and DH, police got involved as he hit me and was being controlling (i didnt report this, im not sure who did). DH was given a Caution, only didn't go to court
During this time our best mates (married) very much stuck with DH and weren't there for me at all and instead were actively working to seperate us.
Ofc DV is awful, I don't want to seem like I'm minimising what DH done to me BUT a lot of stuff happened that destroyed his mental health, he was at breaking point. (Looking back, I do feel bad for not recognising how low he was and throwing myself into my career.) And the police involvement broke him more and then the friends suggesting it was all me trying to destroy his life and take the house and kids broke him further.
Thankfully, we did work on things (our parents helped us through as neutral sounding boards, we did couple counselling and DH got the right support he needed too for his anger), and we are better than ever.
But the friendship between me and the best friends never resolved and actually when DH and I were clearly back together and working well, there was a spat of nasty texts from one of them to me.
DH is still best mates with them, sees them reasonably regularly and texts them daily. DH told me they are expecting their first child and I so badly want to send a "congratulations" card and gift (also I have carefully saved all the best things from our last baby for them as I knew they had planned on TTC this year). But am I being an idiot? Should I rekindle it? Would they even want to?
Sounds all so childish I suppose too doesn't it.