Repeat after me, he’s no gods for me, he’s no good for me, he’s no good for me

[Theonlywayisup1]

Anyone else trying to cut someone out of your life who you know is bad for you? How do you keep yourself on track and stop yourself either being sucked back in or reaching out to them? Need some words of encouragement as feeling like I want to speak to him but know he’ll only make me feel like shit and I’ll be no further forward.

You need to wait it out for a fortnight with zero contact. The love chemicals are still there surging through you making you crave him even if he is terrible for you.

Going through the same thing myself op. Worst possible person, would never and could never work between us. I'm currently forcing myself to not contact him....

I deleted all messages and contact details.

You need Dua Lipa - New Rules on repeat!

I’m 4 days in of totally removing him from my life, although been separated since April. He is now contacting our DS (12) asking why mum won’t respond to him, asking what I’m doing etc. He’s lead me on for months (years if I’m honest) and I know he’s just trying to get back into the position of control, it’s so hard. I did tell him I was going to remove myself completely from his life, so it’s not as if I’m playing games, it’s just hard to tell yourself that he doesn’t want you fully, and certainly has no respect for you. I’ve changed his name in my phone to The liar & The cheat, so it’s reminds me of what he has done rather than seeing his name. But it’s still hard to not want to contact him

Just keep retelling yourself each of the events he was involved in that have made you feel horrific. These events will happen over and over again and ruin your life. Your life is now. Don't let him take it over. Get your life back and start enjoying it to the full again without a c word trying to f it up constantly. I blocked in the end when he refused to respect my boundaries after I ended the relationship. It's been 3 months now and I feel amazing!!!! My house is back on track, i am fully effective at work again, my social life is booming again and my child is very happy to have his happy mum back.

. . . and I'm looking g forward to Christmas for the first time in 3 years!

Just read your update. My ex started to ask the same to my 12 yr old son - that was when I blocked him and blocked on my sons phone too. I also changed his name on my phone to The Manipulator. Your just gonna have to go all out and erase everything. It worked for me.

I recently read something that said:

every time you break your own boundaries to ensure someone else likes you, you like yourself a little less

really helping me to maintain boundaries around someone who has no respect for them- might be helpful to you OP

Thanks so much, I’m going to read these responses everytime I feel like I question why I’m doing this

He has text again this morning and said that if I want him to stop involving our child then I have to reply to his messages. I don’t really want to block him from my sons phone as they talk everyday, but just another example of his bullying ways

I think that if the child is his son then it’s difficult to make your son cut contact with him, unless he is causing distress or harm to him obviously.
He is manipulating the situation of course . Can you just explain sImply to your son that you encourage them to stay in touch but that you would rather he not discuss things that are going on with you , as you don’t live together anymore and should both have some privacy, something along those lines.
I wouldn’t be forced into replying to his messages , the fact he said that would enrage me, like he’s holding your son hostage . What an entitled wanker really !