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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Is it just me ?

35 replies

Angelica122345 · 12/10/2022 12:06

Partner went out on a week night said he was going out with people from work . He came back at 1:00 am . When I asked him which places he went to , he went bright red in the face

OP posts:
Watchkeys · 12/10/2022 19:11

What your parents do or don't do isn't how to judge a relationship (although in this instance it's doing the trick)

How does it make you feel when he says these things? This is about you, and what you are willing to put up with in a relationship. It's not about Mum and Dad.

tinx · 12/10/2022 19:15

Maybe he went to hooters and is too embarrassed to admit it 🙂

Original poster
Angelica122345 · 13/10/2022 18:28

Thank you for your comments it difficult when u feel like not many people to talk too

OP posts:
IsThePopeCatholic · 13/10/2022 18:38

He is being totally disrespectful to you. Don’t put up with him. He’s a sleaze ball.

PeacefulPottering · 13/10/2022 19:09

How old are you OP? He is doing something called negging, it's designed to put you down and make you feel bad, insecure and low. Any partner who said another woman looks shaggable would be gone. You need rid asap.

Original poster
Angelica122345 · 19/10/2022 16:04

Before I go out anywhere meet friends etc , he tells me my breath smells . But no one else has said anything

OP posts:
CharlotteCollinsneeLucas · 19/10/2022 16:39

Stop listening to what he says.

Move out. Move on.

You'll be way happier without him in your life.

KettrickenSmiled · 19/10/2022 17:41

Angelica122345 · 12/10/2022 14:11

No just recently he said he spoke to a woman she was really nice she’s a beautician . Then the other day he said he met two really nice ladies . He also said he saw a woman at the gym and thought she looks shaggable. I didn’t react to it . But it does make me feel insecure

Well I think you SHOULD react to it OP.
By dumping him.

This speech & behaviour is totally unacceptable.
Why are you tolerating it?

KettrickenSmiled · 19/10/2022 17:44

Angelica122345 · 19/10/2022 16:04

Before I go out anywhere meet friends etc , he tells me my breath smells . But no one else has said anything

Please fuck him off out of your life OP.

What PP said about negging is right.
He's also boundary-testing you with this nonsense, to see how much you will put up with from him.
Why wait until you have proof that he's shagging around? It's clear that he wants to, even if he isn't doing it yet.

He is constantly cruel to you, quite deliberately.
Stop letting this just happen to you. TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE & HAPPINESS, & DUMP HIM.

Pinkbonbon · 19/10/2022 17:47

Angelica122345 · 12/10/2022 14:11

No just recently he said he spoke to a woman she was really nice she’s a beautician . Then the other day he said he met two really nice ladies . He also said he saw a woman at the gym and thought she looks shaggable. I didn’t react to it . But it does make me feel insecure

Because its MEANT to make you feel insecure.

What you have us far worse than a cheat, its an abusive partner. Someone who goes out of their way to emotionally mind fuck you. Why would yoi want to be anywhere near someone like that? Let alone know a relationship with.

Why care if he is shagging someone else! Surely it's worse that he actually means you emotional harm. Fuck that! Run for the hills.

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