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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Husband is always late home

5 replies

summerlovingvibes · 11/10/2022 16:08

DH is always always always late. He has a job where it's a set number of hours per day (7.5) plus half hour each end of the day travel and half hour lunch break. So his working day should be 9 hours. Whether he leaves at 6,7,8,9am etc, he never manages to finish on time. He always goes above and beyond with work, and always ends up helping others out, or just getting involved in stuff which takes time. He procrastinates and takes ages with some stuff. He's not massively over loaded at work, he just seems to create work to do 🤷🏻‍♀️

But it really pisses me off. Today he was meant for be home 3:30 because he left early so he could get home to do some work on the house before our toddler gets home from daycare. This was his idea as we are desperately trying to get something finished in the house - We're due another baby soon etc. But he won't be home until 5. Yes he'll get TOIL but I'd rather he just came home when he said he would! So today is another hour and half lost where time is so precious.

I've obviously talked fo him before about this, but it doesn't seem to matter what I say, he doesn't change.

Just not really sure how to manage this really and how not to feel losses off every bloody day!

Rant over!!

OP posts:
frozendaisy · 11/10/2022 17:35

So use the overtime pay to pay for a handyman to finish the house.

KangarooKenny · 11/10/2022 17:38

Sounds like he doesn’t want to change.

TroubledMum100 · 11/10/2022 17:43

Hate to say it but he could have ADHD. No concept of time. Unable to keep commitments - just makes the same mistakes over and over again.

I work with a guy that doesn't have ADHD, but every day the time runs away and he is left catching up. He simply isn't able to discipline himself. I've seen him nearly miss Parents Night, deadlines his wife has set so she can go out - it's always the same and yet he never ever learns and he's not getting up to any mischief he simply needed to focus and stop talking too long.

Hbh17 · 11/10/2022 17:43

He's just doing his job properly - very few jobs have a fixed finishing time in reality. Maybe the poor guy just needs to be able to manage his own time, and not have all this clock-watching.

Alcemeg · 11/10/2022 18:07

If he's a perfectionist and good at his job, could he go freelance?

That way, he could spend more time at home and any extra hours he does are money into your account, not just benefiting an employer.

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