Long Distance Relationship…2 Young Kids

[Chocchoc88]

So I’ve met someone who lives 400 miles away (1hr flight or a 4 hour drive basically). We’ve been seeing each other for about 4 months.

Totally, madly in love with each other, he has adult kids who I’ve met and built a decent relationship with, we see each other every weekend and get on great, we make each other so happy and now wanting to talk about seeing each other more with the goal being to live together However. I have a 2yo and a 1yo who he’s met and brilliant with, but I’m petrified of telling their dad (my ex) about the distance and no idea how to take things further logistically with kids of this age. My ex is a fantastic dad, sees the kids a lot, usually has them of a weekend but we are pretty flexible with each other.

I just don’t know what to do. Of course I want the kids dad to still see his kids as much as possible, do I ‘base’ them here or there? Preschool/school is round the corner and trying to work out what the best situation for the kids is, first and foremost!? My area and his area are both great places to raise kids (probably his area is better) but I just don’t know how to please everybody. Any suggestions?

Honestly OP. The best thing you can do here is to leave the kids with their dad and leave the three of them live in peace. It sounds like he's the only one every remotely interested in what's best for them.

I really hope this whole thread is a joke.

@MayThe4th slut-shaming much? And, even if the OP is a bit ‘loose’ for your liking, how does it automatically make her a ‘car crash’ parent? Single mums are allowed to date and (shock horror!) have sex you know. Has no bearing on their parenting abilities at all. Do better.

OP, if this is in fact a genuine post, you are moving way too fast. Your children need you to be present (both cognitively and geographically). You shouldn’t even be entertaining the idea of relocating. If your new partner was in any way committed to your relationship, it wouldn’t even be a question that he’d move to where you and your infant children call home.

Do yourself a favour and put your kids first.

Must be a wind up! Nobody would make rash decisions like this if they were a responsible parent

400 miles away is an 8 hour drive?

Oh ffs don't do this.
He's still a stranger.

this has red flags all over the place.

I think some of the responses have been a bit cut throat. You never know when you will meet someone special and it is unlikely to coincide with your kids leaving home.

My advice would be to make sure your kids are your #1 priority and wait for at least 12 months before making any major decisions.