Guilt 18 months on

[Stupid810]

18 months ago I lost my mum and then my dad. It put me in a terrible downward spiral of grief. DH was no support and I felt resentful ,lonely and hurt. I was left to raise our children and work without any help at all.
I went to visit a friend who lives at the opposite end of the country and to sum it up got drunk and kissed another friend.
Nothing else happened but this was bad enough.
Our marriage is still not in a good state but I do want to try and make it work.
The guilt is horrendous I have gone to counselling and stopped drinking but I still have days where I feel I should tell him.
I'm pretty sure he will leave and dont want to split up my family, on the other hand I cant stop torturing myself and worrying he will find out.
Just interested in peoples thoughts.

Don't tell him. It won't make you feel better, it will make you both feel shit.
You were drunk and kissed someone - you needed affection. You can't undo it but you can write it off as something minor.

Sorry about your loss.

It's minor, your DH's behaviour towards you was major. If he's still unsupportive, consider splitting, but if you really don't want to then find your support from friends and family, it might make being with your DH more bearable.