Boyfriend taking back his word and twisting situation on me

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Hi all. My bf and i got into an argument regarding a congrats card i found at his home from another woman. He had shared this was from a collegue in the past wishing him well for his next job however, the message was quite personal. Her calling him her pain in his ass . How much she's going to miss him
It just made me feel uncomfortable as this same person contacted him via mobile several months before and he refused to pick it up in front of me. The same name has flagged up atleast 3 times on 3 separate incidents.

Anyways i told him how it made me feel and he agreed he would delete her from social media as they were no longer in contact. I have since asked him if he has done it and he has now deflected went onto my social media and screenshot the people who have "liked" my photo and has now set the focus on me.

I have said to him why did you agree to do this and then take it back and instead of explaining himself he keeps going back to my socials and telling me i enjoy men liking my pictures. He told me i was controlling when he was the one who said he would do it

I know this is all sounds very silly. But he has now told me he is tired of all this. Making me feel as though he no longer wishes to be with me. He hasn't messaged me today as he usually does. We usually speak in the eveining last night didn't call me. I just feel upset because its like he will agree to something to settle an argument but then retract and attack when i ask him about it.

You do sound controlling. If I were him I would reconsider the relationship. I have friends call me and often don’t answer it when I’m with company, including my partner. in fact most people I know do this.
p. How did you happen to find this card?

Get rid.

Well you ARE being controlling in asking him to remove this oersin from his friends list. I wouldn't stay with someone who asked me to do this.

Tbf, if your instincts tell you something us up woth him and this women, they may be right. But if that is the case, what would removing her from his social media achieve? Especially seen as you had to ask him to its not like he chose to.

And now he us accusing you if liking male attention....

Does this relationship sound healthy to you op? Sounds more like a prison of stress and despair to me.

How old are you ? All sounds exhausting

You sound incredibly controlling

Your partner should leave for his own sake at this point

All sounds incredibly toxic.

it’s hard to say who is at fault. You do sound controlling and a bit hypocritical. but this could be in response to his behaviour.

He sounds a bit shady, but it could be in response to you trying to control who he is friends with and kicking off about.

How did you ‘find’ this card, pick it up and read it? All by accident?

To be fair ‘pain in the area’ and ‘missing’ a colleague doesn’t sound unusual for a leaving card

This is not a healthy relationship. You aren't right for each other. You sound very young.

I just feel upset because its like he will agree to something to settle an argument but then retract and attack when i ask him about it

Yes, that's an upsetting process to use. Yours isn't perfect either. You're essentially saying that you told him to do something, and because he agreed to do it, that means it's not controlling. But it was.

Your dynamic is unhealthy. It's coming from you both, and you're both holding onto how 'right' you are (ie dealing with this as 2 people) rather than trying to find a way to make it work for you both (ie dealing with this as a couple)

Do you want to be right (making him wrong), or do you want to be happy as a couple?