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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

When its over

2 replies

lurker1000 · 26/09/2022 12:03

So I've posted before - my husband is a long term compulsive gambler - and things got really bad again over summer. It's all come to a head - he hasn't spoken to me in over a month, now not paying mortgage, bills etc - all communication has broken down and yesterday I told my sister what was going on (she knew things were bad in past but thought it was getting better) - sh*t has hit the fan - I've been airing my dirty laundry, he's moving out now. It's over.

Why is it when you know its for the best that it just hurts so much - feel like such a weakling? I want to be strong for my kids but I'm just so gutted. My family are great and saying all the right things - and in a way saying it out loud to them that he is an addict has really helped, but it all seems so real now. Like no way back from here.

OP posts:
B1rd · 26/09/2022 18:05

You are grieving. You've lost your family set up and life will change from now on.
You've said that it is for the best, but it will still hurt you emotionally. You will move on and at least in your new family set up you won't be worrying about whether the bills are being paid or not. You will get through this.

KateADM · 27/09/2022 13:58

You are not a weakling because you're hurting, you're quite the opposite. You've been so strong to make the right decision for you and your kids. Please keep reaching out to your family, they sound wonderful and I'm glad you have that support.

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