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Relationships

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Flip

Original poster

Your take on this please

10 replies

Adventureoflife · 20/09/2022 02:55

My OH has divorced parents of 30 years, it has caused issues during the course of their life.
One of OH siblings has a rocky relationship with one of their parents. They have 3 children who don’t see/know that particular grandparent.

OH has a relatively good relationship with both parents. We are due to vacation and visit them in 4 weeks time, it has been planned for a few months now.

OH sibling has now just announced they would like to get their 1 year old christened on the same weekend we are due to be away with the parent that they have a fractured relationship with.

I don’t want to get involved or give an opinion on this but at the same time I’m wondering what you all think of this situation please?

OP posts:

HighlandPony · 20/09/2022 03:06

Steer clear. Let him deal with it. His family and no matter what you do you will end up with someone not being happy.

this is from experience. We eloped to avoid exactly this type of situation from my husbands family who are aaallll divorced and not speaking.

Monty27 · 20/09/2022 03:23

Carry on with your plans.

Nevertouchakoala · 20/09/2022 03:28

Damed if you do and damed if you don’t

AiryFairyLights · 20/09/2022 03:28

I would say immediately “I’m so sorry we’re away that date” and continue on with your plans.
Don’t get involved in their fractured relationship x

HighlandPony · 20/09/2022 03:43

Nevertouchakoala · 20/09/2022 03:28

Damed if you do and damed if you don’t

Exactly this

LoekMa · 20/09/2022 05:33

From what I gather in my country, Christenings are primarily for the God-Parents, so if your OH sibling isnt a God parenr, then they should respectfully inform their sibling that prior plans were made.

Aquamarine1029 · 20/09/2022 05:53

I don't see what the situation is, honestly. You won't be able to attend, and where you're going is irrelevant. His sibling will just have to deal with it.

Mabelstearooms · 20/09/2022 06:02

You already have plans/a holiday so you don't need to cause a situation.

Is this christening even booked yet?

Original poster

Adventureoflife · 20/09/2022 14:39

Unfortunately by going away and saying we can’t attend the christening is likely to create a situation. Definitely stuck between a rock and a hard place.

i doubt the christening has been booked yet, it’s quite last minute unless this is the norm in some countries?

OP posts:

NotLactoseFree · 20/09/2022 16:47

Take the fact that it's a parent out of the equation - if you had booked a trip away, planned flights/accommodation etc, would you seriously consider cancelling because your niece/nephew is being christened? Because I wouldn't.

Also, assuming it's not a secret that your OH still has a relationship with both parents, there's no need to lie about this. You have a prior arrangement.

It might get more complicated if you were invited to both events at the same time and then had to make a decision. But that's not the case here, so I think it's a non-issue.

Flip