My exH used to get in fights when he was younger and before we met.
A few months into our relationship he told me there had been a bit of trouble just before he started dating me.
He described it as his then gf flirting with another guy in a club so he was annoyed and left soon after.
Years later, he told me he had actually headbutted the other guy!
Of course, it will come as no surprise that he had a fiery temper and used violent language.
Always saying what he might do to so and so in a given situation.
If I challenged him he would call me disloyal and say stuff like "what do you expect me to do?"
I'm away from it all now and feel less anxious.
He was often on the edge of anger and very easily annoyed.
It just upsets me that the head butting incident happened a few days before we started dating. I hate violence.
He reckons he split up with his girlfriend after it happened. I had no idea he had these tendencies. It was all romantic and wonderful when we first met.
But then, the years that followed were so difficult in many ways.
I didn't realise he was like this until it was too late. I chose to ignore some red flags I saw early on and also hoped he would change.
And now, after many years and having children I've finally left him and feel so relieved.
He would still say my opinion is wrong and he always justifies his actions.
He made me doubt myself for years.
I'm still recovering from it all.
Writing it all down on here helps me.
Your messages help me.