I’ve been mentally unwell in pregnancy and worried I’ve harmed my baby

[Bauxfu]

I’ve self harmed, cried for days on end, proper hard sobbing to the point of being sick. Gone through heartbreak of different kinds including a death. I’ve not eaten well. My stomach has been always in knots. I have mental health support but I am just clinging on. I’m 7 months and terrified of damage to the baby. Just wondered if anyone had any insight into this. Given my mental state I don’t think midwife would be honest with me.

Your midwife would be honest, that's just the depression and anxiety talking. I was extremely anxious with my first and not at all with my second. My first was my chilled out baby, the second is rather emotional (to put it mildly). Both of them were poorly at birth but are fine now, at almost four and 20 months. Get proper help and support but try not to make yourself feel worse by thinking you've harmed your baby. It takes more than bad MH and a poor diet to do actual harm.

I wish people wouldn't spread the myth that stress or anything harms a baby, as it's so worrying for women.

It's pretty much impossible to harm a baby through stress.

It'll all be ok @Bauxfu ❤

How're you doing now? Try and get some food in you as that's something you could improve and help your baby be even more awesome. x

Thanks. I am not in a good place. I have a lot of mental health support but the cloud won’t lift.

Terrified of being an awful mum.

I'm sorry you are feeling so low but I'm sure your baby will be fine

I'm so sorry you're feeling so upset.
I can't speak re mental health but I had terrible sickness with both my pregnancies.
Lost weight , hardly ate.
Both babies turned out very healthy.

Oh gosh @Bauxfu I remember feeling like this during my pregnancy. I had frequent panic attacks and suicidal thoughts and stress from being an an abusive relationship. And then that stress was compounded by the fear that my mental state had affected my baby!

It really, really, didn't - she is now 10, and delightful.

But please take care of yourself. I'm glad you have mental health support, getting help is a really positive step that I wish I had taken during my pregnancy.