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Original poster

What is it called when someone breaks up with you vaguely but doesn't mean it?

28 replies

easyjetyet · 15/09/2022 18:35

He has form for vaguely finishing relationships eg I'm not sure how I feel or I think this is the end or the usual cliches ... after an argument but really has no intention of it and when you call his bluff, he backtracks and hounds you down ?
When he has wronged you and can't take responsibility ? Is there a name on this.
It's new to me, this behaviour and I'm well and truly over the bullshit.

How do you deal with this when you are truly over the relationship and see the wood for the trees?
What do
You when he comes crawling back and starts to bombard you ?
This is a grown man btw... 48 years of age.

OP posts:
MaryJoLisa · 15/09/2022 18:36

It's called fuckwittery. You tell him to do one, block and delete.

Fairislefandango · 15/09/2022 18:37

It's called being a twat.

AnyFucker · 15/09/2022 18:38

Arseholery

Tell him to fuck off

OldSkoool · 15/09/2022 18:40

A clown 🤡

Just fuck him off

LiesDoNotBecomeUs · 15/09/2022 18:42

It is called 'making himself your ex'.

RudsyFarmer · 15/09/2022 18:42

He’s a head fuck. There’s no legs to this relationship so bin him off if you want something serious.

MushMonster · 15/09/2022 18:42

It is actually the same pattern as an abusive relationship, just a mild version.
Trying to control the woman, threatening with breaking up because she does not agree with you/ want to pander to you. Then being really nice if she starts walking away. Back to square one.
Not worthy your time.
Sadly it could be a learnt pattern, from parents or other relationships. He wil need to work on that if he ever wants a long term relationship.

wellhelloitsme · 15/09/2022 18:46

Manipulation at best, abuse at worst.

Bin him off for good!

jannier · 15/09/2022 19:03

easyjetyet · 15/09/2022 18:35

He has form for vaguely finishing relationships eg I'm not sure how I feel or I think this is the end or the usual cliches ... after an argument but really has no intention of it and when you call his bluff, he backtracks and hounds you down ?
When he has wronged you and can't take responsibility ? Is there a name on this.
It's new to me, this behaviour and I'm well and truly over the bullshit.

How do you deal with this when you are truly over the relationship and see the wood for the trees?
What do
You when he comes crawling back and starts to bombard you ?
This is a grown man btw... 48 years of age.

Waste of time and space...bin him he's a child.

Johnnysgirl · 15/09/2022 19:04

Why are you allowing this idiot to come back?? Stop it!

Original poster
easyjetyet · 15/09/2022 20:27

Oh he is gone. Just never had one like him. Strange !

OP posts:
EmmaH2022 · 15/09/2022 20:36

Glad it's done
what do you mean by "hounds you down"?

Original poster
easyjetyet · 15/09/2022 20:45

When I pulled away he starts hounding me with self pitying and poor me texts. Sends flowers, does stuff I've been asking him to do for ages, constant contact.
So I've blocked him.

OP posts:
JaneyBrowning · 15/09/2022 20:51

easyjetyet · 15/09/2022 20:45

When I pulled away he starts hounding me with self pitying and poor me texts. Sends flowers, does stuff I've been asking him to do for ages, constant contact.
So I've blocked him.

It's called Push-Pull.
Read about it on the site Baggage Reclaim.

It's a form of control and a bit narcassistic.

Original poster
easyjetyet · 15/09/2022 20:51

Dick

OP posts:
CaptainCorellisBagpipes · 15/09/2022 20:59

OP you said "What is it called when someone breaks up with you vaguely but doesn't mean it?"

It means he's an ar$eho£e, and as others have advised, block, delete, flush and look for something better.

Just pull the plug OP, you can do better than man who messes with your feelings like this.

XmasElf10 · 15/09/2022 21:26

It’s called being a cunt and I’d dump his arse for it (and mean it).

Tulua2 · 15/09/2022 21:26

If you’ve blocked him does he still have other ways to contact you for example turning up at your house?

Scotcousin · 15/09/2022 21:32

I'd an ex who told me after 4 years "I don't know how I feel". I should have ended it then and there but didn't, and kick myself now. Five months later he told me he'd never been in love with me. I said "so that's it then, we're over" and he replied "I don't know, I think we're good for each other". If he didn't know what he wanted then, after 4.5 years together, he never would. Of course that was the end!

Scotcousin · 15/09/2022 21:33

And this man is in his 50s.

GreenManalishi · 15/09/2022 21:37

It's called a waste of time, and you block it and ignore it

AgentJohnson · 16/09/2022 03:39

An Ex, who you never reply to.

JangolinaPitt · 16/09/2022 03:50

My friend called it the Toxic Tango

Monty27 · 16/09/2022 03:57

I spent 13 years in an off on relationship.
Bin him. I wasted my time.

Monty27 · 16/09/2022 04:18

I don't know what it was called OP but I didn't know about gaslighting and narcissism in those days. There was other stuff like lack of intimacy and feeling reliant on him as I was a single parent.
Long story.

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