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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Need some help and advice

2 replies

Tolovelikestars · 15/09/2022 14:18

Please help me or tell me what might make this better.

I have a terrible relationship with my family. Just have the one sister and mother and for my own sanity, I think I have to completely break contact. My sister is extremely negative, has no friends and Used to emotionally lash out if I couldn’t listen to her on the phone for hours every day.

it’s caused me lots of anxiety and upset and two years ago we stopped talking. She has this relationship with my mum who does listen but I think their reliance on each other is unhealthy and toxic. I talk to my mum sporadically but she tells me that my sister says I don’t care about them and I only care about my friends. Despite this, if my mum needs help she asks me and only me. If she doesn’t need help, I got for months without hearing from her. Literally months.

in the last few weeks, this has really got me down. And I feel so upset and anxious about it all. I feel alone. I also feel like my sister poisons a lot if my relationships with other people. In the past, I’ve invited her out with my friends because she doesn’t have anyone and she gets along well with one of them. she used to ring up my then partner and complain about me and thought that was normal behaviour.

I feel anxious now because I think she talks to one of my friends and it makes me angry that she thinks it’s ok to enter my space like this. I’m not going to bring it up with my friend but I just feel anxious and I wonder how to deal with it.

I feel incredibly alone and so lonely. But I also know for my own health I have to do this. I have friends but I feel I can’t share this with them and ultimately I feel very cut off.

when you feel anxious about something, how do you cope with it? Especially if there’s nothing you can do about it.

OP posts:
Tolovelikestars · 15/09/2022 18:51

Anyone?

OP posts:
YoSofi · 15/09/2022 22:23

Are you close to your friends?

It might help if you can be honest with them about what’s happening so they can support you?

I do think you need to go no contact, you’re mental health will improve no end.

Have a read of the Stately Homes thread on here x

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