Why do I keep thinking about being single.

[MamaMama20]

Hi everyone. Pretty much what the title says ... and it's not to go sleeping around or anything I am just thinking would I be happier on my own and focus on me.
Bit of a back ground I have an amazing man for a husband who is kind, caring and I know would never hurt me but I just feel like I would be happier alone. We have a gorgeous little boy who is my world and he is a brill daddy to him.
I just feel like we don't connect anymore, we don't enjoy each others companies and find myself comparing our relationship to others which I know is wrong.
He is aware that things needs to change I have told him but they never seem too?

Has anyone else been in the situation and come out stronger than before ?

What things need to change - and why are they not?

As in spending more time together even just watching tv I am mainly on my phone and he's got the TV. We both say we are going to stop it and spend more time together but we don't it's like none of us can be bothered to put the effort in and that's what is giving me alarm bells. I know it's not just him it's both of us but I don't know how much times we have to keep going down the route for one of us actually make the effort

When I first started fantasising about being single it was the beginning of the end of my marriage. However if you want to save your marriage this point is the point it can be changed if you both take action!! You could try and salvage some intamacy back or romance and quality time.
The next stage for me was becoming infatuated with another man and then there was no hope!!
I'm 3 years divorced now

How long have you been together and how old is your little boy?

Yes, I should have understood more that my feeling that way meant I was ready to get out of marriage. In the end it ended with his cheating, but I don't doubt our general drifting apart given I was feeling like you, was a part of it.

Thanks for your replies, it's nice to know I am
Not the only who is / has been in this situation. I don't want to feel like this cause he honestly is a great person but I can't help but feeling excited when I think of starting over again but probably never would anyhow as I hate hurting people and hurting him would just break my heart. Our son is 2 and we have been together for 13 years so a long time.
We went away with family in June and spent a lot of time arguing, on the day before we went home we agreed to stop arguing over petty stuff and enjoy our time which we did and it was nice we both really made an effort talking and being affectionate however since getting home and getting back into normal work life things have soon gone back to normal ...
maybe this is just the normality of married life and I am just after more excitement who knows.

Has anyone got any tips on how to keep the spark alive ?

No. I left. Only 2 months ago, and it is lovely.

@LunasMom2 was there any other problems in the marriage or just purely you wanting to be single ? If you don't mind me asking

I was lonely in the marriage. He was emotionelly distant. I needed more.

I know that a lot of people say that they managed to work it out, but I personally think that its impossible. Once you start thinking about leaving there is no going back. And by the way you do not just start wanting to be single out of nothing, that is symply a sign that something is wrong in the relationship.

If you want to work it out, I suggest you start couples therapy and that will show you where you both are at. Good luck OP, I wish you all the best.

Is a trial separation a possibility?

In all honesty though, I think it's time to walk away from the relationship. It seems like you have switched off from it, he's not bothered about fixing up, and you're only with him because you share a a child and a lot of history.

I've been there where I've stayed in a relationship because he was a good guy. But there came a point where I realised it wasn't enough. Life is too short to stay in an okay relationship. Go be single. When I ended my long term relationship, I spent a lot of time being single and it was great to find myself again.