SO nervous for second date

[nervyb]

Hi!
I have a second date tonight with a man who is really lovely. I am so so nervous though because I feel a lot more pressure than the first date. Is this where you ask about family, futures etc.?! I have no experience of date number 2 so have no idea where it should lead.
I should add first date went great with a few kisses so a good connection is there.

I would just go in with no expectations and see where the conversation naturally leads. I personally would t have those conversations just yet but that’s purely my preference. I would say at this point keep the conversation fun and enjoy getting to know each other. Good luck and have fun!

Can you explain why you feel "pressure" ?

I wouldn't ask about "family" or "futures" at this stage, just keep the chat light. Find out about what his hobbies and interests are, what he does for a living, how long he's lived in the area, has he any pets, what books has he read and/or films seen recently. etc

Keep alcohol to a minimum and just enjoy his company.

Good luck.

Ooh exciting but nerve racking!

I guess it depends on lots of things like how you met / were you friends of friends or OLD / what you actually nearby for the future ie your ages and if you want kids and are on a timeline

I think I'd keep discussion of futures out of a second date TBH feels a bit too soon for that

Thank you everyone!
We met OLD. He has no children and I have one. I get scared we've spoken about all there is to speak about but that's definitely an irrational fear I think I feel pressure to be the best I can be but I just need to breathe and be myself. Dating is very scary to me
I will give an update afterwards!

@nervyb

Ooh keep us posted I'm Nervous about OLD - haven't ventured there yet because most people say it's awful!

Which one did you meet on??

I'm having a second date tonight as well, met OLD, but having been messaging for about 8 weeks now (various work/family reasons why we havent' been able to meet up more often). But we don't really need to have a "future" type discussion as we're both older and have had all the DC each of us want at this point.
OP, just go with the flow conversation-wise, follow on from things you talked about before. Have a fantastic time (I know where my evening is heading already, and it's sounding promising 😉)

@toooldtodate I've been really lucky so far with OLD - I haven't been taking it at all seriously, and just having fun with seeing who's out there. I'm 50, and have had interest from all ages (including a 20 year old!!), but current bloke is early 40s. Bumble was better for me than Hinge (which is where the 20 yo came from).

Just chill and enjoy. Trying to remember what i talked about with my partner I met on Tinder - just general stuff I think. Serious conversation was date 4, date 3 was ahem 😊

I mean this gently, but you'll never get anywhere with this defeatist attitude!

Just be yourself and have fun!

I met my husband 3.5yrs ago OLD

It does work ;)

Good luck and keep us posted! X

Ah i have 30 mins! Just going to be completely authentic and if he doesn't like me there's plenty more fish in the sea

@toooldtodate tinder!

How did it go?!

@mycatisannoying

I know! But you should read the other OLD thread running at the moment - it's one horror story after another and it's scared me a bit!

Argh I remember that feeling, we had such a brilliant first date, talked all night until the restaurant threw us out, I went into the 2nd worried what there was left to talk about!

We went to his and shagged instead

I'm pleased to say 4 years down the track, we haven't run out of things to say to each other.

I hope you haven't fallen into bed with him. If you do that you've fucked it up. Pun absolutely intended.

Hahaha I'll let my fiance and love of my life know.

I really hope this goes well for you.

My advice for what it's worth - stay off the heavy stuff for now. If you really do click you will find that there is plenty to talk about and it won't be an effort. Even periods of silence are fine if it is someone you really enjoy being with.

Good luck

How did it go?!