need advice please

[confused1960]

Hi all Im new here but could really do with some advice.
Ive been with my boyfriend for 5 yrs, everything was good.
He has 3 kids i have 2 and we all get on. We work together as well.
His ex wife left him 6 yrs ago and moved with another man. My boyfriend had no idea she was seeing someone else and he was devastated when she left. He hasn't seen or spoken to her since.
His oldest son is due to be married in 2 weeks time and he found out his kids were still in contact and she had been invited.
Hes been acting strange towards me since he found out she was attending, mood swings, ignoring me etc. I asked him what was up and he just said he wasn't happy in the relationship and ended it last week. A few days later he texted saying he would still like to be friends and he's been texting daily. Of course Im off the wedding party list as a result of this.
He's a creature of habit but he's suddenly changing his appearance, trying not to wear his glasses, new clothes etc.
Then yesterday he said after the wedding he would like to have a few days break and would I like to go with him,
I said no as we aren't together anymore, his reply was things can change.
Do you think he did this to see if he could get her back or does he not want me there because she there.
Its no good saying talk to him as he's not the sort of man to open up, his feelings are well and truly hidden.
Im just so confused.

Sounds like he doesn't want you there as she is going. He is hoping to get back with her, if not - you are the back-up plan. Sorry OP

He does not want you and his ex in the same room. I would be very very wary.

Yeah he doesn't want you to meet his ex.

He wants to be available to her and make himself look his best to show her what she's missing.

You're the back up for if she rejects him.

I'm sorry. He's pathetic. You deserve so much more.

Crikey, 5 years together, good relationship up until he was about to meet his ex again. Bam...you are dumped and he tries to make himself look super cool for the ex. Sorry OP this must be awful for you to go through. I think he was secretly hoping once his ex clapped eyes on him from across the room she would go running into his arms and go off into the sunset together. So sorry OP but good for you for sticking to your guns and not venturing away with this pathetic person. Unfortunately now you know you were just the sticking plaster in his healing from his ex. You deserve so much more than this. I know its a very painful time for you but keep going. He is not worth your time anymore.

Thank you all for your replies, You've confirmed what I thought.

Confused, he hopes to have a chance with her, so he created distance and then broke up. Now he wants to keep you around as his Plan B. How insulting. Stay strong when he attempts to hoover you after the wedding.

Best advice I can give you is stop trying to work out what he's thinking and why he's behaving this way and focus on the way he's treated you and how that's making you feel. The way he has behaved is unacceptable whatever the reason and the best thing you can do is walk away before he destroys your self esteem. Ultimately it doesn't matter why he's done what he's done, what matters is that you're worth more than being treated like this and your self esteem is too important to put up with it.

I don't think he necessarily hopes for another chance with his ex. I do think he doesn't want you both in the same room as secrets from his past might come out.
He is treating you appallingly and quite frankly I would dump him even on friends level.