Years ago, I stopped nagging DH to do housework. As a result, I do most of it and he seems to get a random surge of energy to do it every few weeks or so. It works ok. He's a great attentive dad to our DS so I'd say things are pretty equal.
HOWEVER
Over the last few weeks I've been so so tired around 9pm. DH has said a couple of times that I should go to bed and leave all the washing up in the kitchen for him. He does this around 1am when he goes to bed and not to a great standard. While I'm not a clean freak, I feel much better going to bed knowing, dishes are clean, dried and put away and the sink and surfaces are clean. Last night 9.30 rolled around and he said he'd clean up. There were dishes from 2 hours previously so I decided to do the kitchen clean up instead.
Very out of character, DH stormed in shouting 'i said I'd do it!' He saw me doing the cleaning as 'undermining him' and as an attack. I explained why I wanted to do it and he called me insane and told me to eff off.
I was so angry and scared. I asked about the over reaction. He said I always make him feel bad, not enough and undermine him. I apologised and said it was never my intention. He apologised though my feelings are still a bit hurt.
Things are a bit awkward today and I don't seem to be able to break the ice. How would you move forward?