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Original poster

What to do now its over?

5 replies

ellie09 · 03/09/2022 06:09

I have a 5 year old and broke up with my partner yesterday. We were together for one year.

Im not as cut up about it as I thought. I had a partner before where it moved pretty fast and I had vowed with this one that I would keep somewhat of a distance so I wouldn't become entangled in anything if it all ended.

I am a bit upset, but nothing like with previous break ups. I am just a bit lost on what to do next.

Do I just have my own time and stay single/not actively looking or do I get straight back in there?

OP posts:
Jellycatspyjamas · 03/09/2022 12:08

Take some time out, figure out who you are as a person in your own right, look for any patterns in your relationships that don’t serve you well and work on yourself. I think especially given there’s a small child in the mix it’s important to just take some time for you both before adding a new man into the mix.

DisplayPurposesOnly · 03/09/2022 12:24

Bloody hell, it was only yesterday.

So I would say slow down. Take some time out from relationships. Enjoy your child, spend time with your friends.

Isittrueornot · 03/09/2022 14:18

There’s no time issue or deadline, if you want to jump straight back in do that, if not don’t, there is no right or wrong answers, just what you feel.

Not everyone needs to take time for themselves after a break up and heal and all that nonsense…especially if you don’t particularly care about the break up- do what you want.

goldenlillacs19 · 03/09/2022 17:15

@ellie09 I would gently suggest not to isolate yourself. By being with other (good) people, you will manage. Being with someone for a long time can create a real physical addiction and being away from that can create a withdrawal of sorts -- real physical symptoms.

It's important not too push yourself too hard, especially in the evenings and in the morning (when cortisol is high) though do try and talk to someone kind face to face it doesn't have to be romantic.

Attempts to create your own support network? Being physically WITH other people who are kind can and will help. Just don't isolate yourself, try and connect face to face with good people even if you don't feel like it at times x

goldenlillacs19 · 03/09/2022 17:19

I have no idea why my text came out crossed out. I wasn't making fun of your situation, OP, sorry

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