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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

FDR with a very difficult man

7 replies

Ithinkitstime · 29/08/2022 17:47

Hi All,

I'm currently facing a financial dispute resolution with a very difficult man. There has been domestic and financial abuse in this case, but I am informed that these things have no bearing on how the equity and assets are split.

I have been litigating for myself because of the costs and attended a very difficult first appointment on Friday that left me frightened and shaking afterwards. There was an admin stuff up by the courts that made the whole thing a bit of a fiasco. (I have put in a complaint about this).

I am currently researching using direct access barristers as I don't feel confident to represent myself against this man.

We now need to put in offers to each other before the next hearing. I know that he will play games with this and be pedantic and difficult. I think he will be hard to fight against because he doesn't play by the rules. Basically, he ticks every box for NPD so I am very scared of losing my home or being placed in a very difficult place financially.

He has no contact with the children as they have chosen not to see him. His wages are les than half of what I earn as he lost his high earning job and career 4 years ago because of something he had done in the past.

It's all very difficult and very sad. I guess what I am asking for from anyone who knows or has been in a similar place, is advice and ideas on how to proceed and hope that I can get through this horrible thing.

OP posts:
oviraptor21 · 29/08/2022 17:50

If there's domestic abuse then I'm surprised you haven't got legal aid.
However, assuming you haven't. Support Through Court may be able to help you www.supportthroughcourt.org/

Pegs11 · 29/08/2022 18:21

Following this post as I am concerned a similar situation may arise for me soon…

jayhoo · 29/08/2022 19:28

Have you thought about using a Mackenzie friend?

Ithinkitstime · 06/09/2022 16:52

No legal aid as my wages and property value mean I don't qualify.
Will follow your link though so thank you

OP posts:
Ithinkitstime · 06/09/2022 16:53

Will look up Mackenzie friend too

OP posts:
bluetatoo · 06/09/2022 16:56

yes contact the court and see if there are any charities that can help you - they sometimes have retired or student solicitors. Good Luck.

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