MondaysAreFineItsYourLifeThatsShit ·
28/08/2022 12:19
Absolutely massive heartbreak in 2020, spent two full years in bits. Thought I would NEVER recover. But actually... fuck it. He was up to his eyeballs in kids anyway and never made me feel that secure in the first place. I've pissed and moaned for ages about being lonely and unloved and why why why 🎻 blah blah blah. But actually... I'm starting to feel past caring. Sometimes even quite content. In the past few weeks I feel like I've shifted to a different place. When I look at all the relationships around me there aren't many of them I'd actually want to be in. Some of them are lovely yes. Some of them are okay. Some of them are absolutely terrible. Yes there are parts of being single that are difficult. It's no picnic. Christmas is sad. But also being in a relationship is hard, even the right ones. Tolerance, patience, compromise. All skills that I don't have. I own a beautiful home, it's decorated just how I want it to be. Don't want someone else leaving their shit everywhere. Live in a lovely area. Not wealthy but (touch wood) I'm doing okay financially. Got a little nest egg. I have good friends. I've got hobbies and interests. I love to get outside on the mountain bike or go for a nice long walk in the countryside. I'm about to start some voluntary work for a local charity. Hopefully I'll make some new friends there too. I starfish the shit out of my own bed! I absolutely LOVE my own company. Nothing better than having a whole weekend to myself with no plans. Couldn't be doing with any Needy Nellies. As for sex? Meh. I'd rather read a book or dig out the Nintendo Switch to be honest. I don't see all the fuss. Yes every now and then I could do with a right good one 😃 but would I want someone in my life who expected me to put out three times a week? Would I fuck. Just the thought irritates me. Twice a year would do me. I do remember being in love and it really is amazing... but in my experience never ends well and all goes to shit eventually anyway. I do think of how lovely it would be to have a partner, the RIGHT partner and camper van all around the UK together etc. But it's all a pipe dream really and especially coming on here and reading dozens upon dozens of predicaments women find themselves in and the amount of SHIT they inexplicably put up with. I hear all the noise about how life is about finding someone to enjoy it with, I hear all these songs about love and how you're nothing if nobody loves you etc and yes it does hurt hearing that and makes you feel a bit worthless. It's all a bit Disney though isn't it? That isn't real for a lot of people, only the lucky ones. Is it strange that at the grand old age of 38... I just can't be fucked with it anymore? Is anyone else out there Romance Retired at my age?