Would u continue if husband says can’t see a future?

[Moonandstars123]

My husband has told me he can’t see a future with me but he can’t bear without not seeing his daughter (age 7). I said we come as a pair and he can’t “have his cake and eat it”, meaning, he can’t treat me like a flat mate just to have access, he needs to be my husband and basically if he’s not prepared to do that then he should leave. I gave him this ultimatum and was really painful but I don’t think he will actually pull the plug so to speak as divorce/living separately in this financial climate is not only going to be stressful but tricky financially.

I want to be married to him. It’s my wish. I’m considering trying hard to “win him back”. If I was younger, I’d think I wouldn’t waste my time with someone not into me but I’m no teenager!

just want quick opinions - general vote to keep trying or to let him go? Thank you!!!

Goodness let him go.
Why would you want to be with someone who doesn't love you.

Let him go and don’t weaponise your child. Why do you want to use your daughter as a way to force your husband into staying with you? Wouldn’t you rather be in a relationship with someone who actually wants to be with you?

I'd like to win the next Euro Millions, but in reality there's bu99er all chance of things going my way so I accept the inevitable.

Hahahah! Love this!

He's talking about it in those terms, not OP.

if I was younger I’d think I had time for this sort of attitude. I remember letting my first 2 boyfriends of about 7yrs each go but I can’t go through life having 6/7 yr relationships. I dont really want another partner. I was hoping marriage meant forever.

He said he couldn’t bear the thought of not seeing his daughter and she said he ‘couldn’t have his cake and eat it’ and they ‘come as a package deal’ and that she gave him an ultimatum. That to me suggests at the very least a threat of not allowing him access, or as much access, to DC, in order to keep him in the marriage.
I obviously don’t know exactly what was said but it seems he wants to leave and I can’t understand why you would stay in a relationship with someone who doesn’t want to be with you.

resentment will build and you’ll end up splitting up anyway. You can’t force someone to stay with you.

He said he couldn’t bear the thought of not seeing his daughter and she said he ‘couldn’t have his cake and eat it’ and they ‘come as a package deal’ and that she gave him an ultimatum. That to me suggests at the very least a threat of not allowing him access, or as much access, to DC, in order to keep him in the marriage.

I read this as H insisting he wants to see their DD daily, as in, so that nothing changes for him, whereas OP doesn't want to live with him as housemates to allow for this, which is perfectly understandable IMO. I think you two need to divorce and thrash out a reasonable custody arrangement. I may have got the wrong end of the stick here though, who knows 🤷🏼‍♀️

If he stays it will be as a flatmate, as someone waiting for the day your daughter is old enough to leave home, so he can. He may look for an affair, and feel justified to do so.

Kick him out