Argh. Really sad, I've decided to basically "never go back" to family after a very long decade plus of slow events/ experiences that have left me feeling there's nothing really for me to go back to apart from more salt in my wounds. I'm having a woe is me moment. It's painful as they meant so much to me. I'm sad for my child as I didn't expect to end up distancing myself from them. Life's shit sometimes.