Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Possible new relationship

2 replies

Kmo2486 · 19/08/2022 10:30

This is going to be a long post but wondering how to make a relationship work with a man I’ve been friends with and known 7 years who recently moved near me.

We spoke on internet 7 years back and met a few times we lived like 2 hours apart so wasn’t often. It was him who kept in touch after we hadn’t spoke for a bit. This year he moved near me, he was looking to move as he didn’t like area he lived so after I mentioned he should move near me he did.

So in April this year he moved near me. We both have same idea we would like to get in a relationship, but don’t want to rush or ruin the friendship we have. We have been seeing each other most days even if it’s just to walk our dogs (we both have 1). We have also both joined a leisure centre gym that does exercise classes and we both enjoy similar classes so have been going together and walking there and back together. We are both used to being alone so are both getting used to spending more time together but it’s going well.

We have spoken a bit about past relationships neither of us have had a relationship for years. My friend had mentioned telling people about us a few week back and mentioned going away a few days to London or stay at his a night. But I think he felt he was rushing things as we also kissed me and said he felt we’d rushed things a bit. It had been him who made first move but I was happy. After that he didn’t mention anything about relationship for a few month. I’d guessed he just wanted to stay as friends and things are going well so left it at that. We take our dogs walks together most days we can both do things on our own if we want and just walk when we are both free. We have had a few meals out and been to a pub quiz together. We have now planned a single day trip to London to see if we like it and how things go. Last night he messaged me after we’d took dogs out saying part of him wants to give things a go in relationship but he’s worried things may end badly (which is possible in any relationship) I have said from start staying mates is most important anything more is a bonus. We live 5 min walk apart both go to same classes at gym so even if we didn’t plan to meet there is high chance we would see each other which could be awkward for us both if things didn’t work out. He’s said he is starting to get some feelings for me and other day we didn’t see each other as he was at a new social group he’s started then went out with a new friend from there. I did a class at gym and I came out and he’d messaged me saying he was out with his dog and would meet me to walk back for my dog. I’ve learnt from past relationships the little things do make a difference and it is little things like this that I like about him. He has the attitude that we should just let things happen naturally rather than trying to force them to happen. I’ve done that before in past relationship and we never got much past being like mates. I tend to get more feelings when I am in relationship but am letting him decide the speed we go as I would want to do more than him at the moment. So we are going to see how we both feel after London next month.

OP posts:
Smellywellyhoo · 19/08/2022 13:50

Do you actually fancy each other? From reading it, it seems you have only kissed once. Sexual chemistry can definitely grow but my impression is that you seem really good friends but it's a platonic rather than romantic connection at this stage.

mooshypooshy · 19/08/2022 13:55

Too much overthinking. Either go for it or just stay friends. All this navel gazing will kill this before it's even started. To be honest, you don't seem to have a lot of chemistry and that is vital in a relationship.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread