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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Everything is wrong, feel so low and wish I could disappear.............................

4 replies

belle74 · 21/01/2008 10:20

I just feel that I have reached the end of my tether. It seems like nothing will ever get better.

last year was just one problem after the other, went back to work when Dswas 6 MO but have spent as much time with him at home ill as at work. Oh refuses to take time off from his job so Its always me.

Ds had some health issues which whilst not 'serious' have caused me immeasurable worry and stress, not much help forthcoming from NHS but eventually got help in private sector which we could il afford.

Been trying to sell the house for a year and a half, its OH's house. I owned a flat which I sold last year to enable us to buy a place together but as we are not able to sell his place I feel I have had the little bit of security I had taken away. I only made a few thousand from the sale as I had not owned it long and that was spent on DS treatment. OH refuses to put me on mortgage due to previous bad experience and most days I end up pondering/ worrying what would happen to DS and me if 'something happened'. Both Oh's dad and mine died when young, his dad left his mum well looked after but mine didnt so we spent years struggling and tht terrifies me.

My work has relocated an xtra 20 kiles away, getting there is now gargantuan effort (thats hgow it feels).

Oh seems to be suffering from depression and is VERY difficult to live with (not a bad person but certainly not much fun at present) He refuses to go to his GP as he is worries about the implication having a diagnosis would have on his work prospects.
our relationship is like brother and sister at the moment with no prospect of improvement as far as I can see.

Had a death in the family last year and now I have been ill solidly for last 6 weeks.

I am really sorry this post is probably just a rant but Just desperately needed to 'tell' someone!!!!!!

Does anyone else feel this way/ have similar problems?

OP posts:
theUrbanDryad · 21/01/2008 10:26

oh sweetheart - you're not alone. it feels like an uphill struggle doesn't it?

is the house well presented/tidy/look nice when people are viewing it? it isn't over valued is it? has your OH thought about changing agents?

no real advice i'm afraid, just a lot of sympathy.

HappyWoman · 21/01/2008 10:28

It sounds terrible and I am sure it feels that way to you to. It is hard but try and keep your chin up and often just making that effort will make you feel like you are doing something and you may feel better.

January is a crap month anyway with the constant horrid weather and the bills just keep coming in.

Anyway i am sure others will come and post some more practical solutions for you.

belle74 · 21/01/2008 10:33

Urban dryad thank you so much for replying
Am just sat here weeping whilst my beautiful son is left upstairs in his cot on his own, I just don;t want him to see me like this.

The house is really old and needs stuff doing to it. We have dropped the price twice and when we looked on rightmove there is only one house cheaper in the whole town! We have tried so damn hard to make it presnetable but it is really small and its so difficult with a small child isnt it.

This house has a lot of bad memories and will never ever feel like my home. Sometimes I feel like leaving Oh and renting a place just me an Ds, at least I would be in control of that. But then that involves leaving OH and I don't want that.

Am just so tired and just cant seem to turn things around.x

OP posts:
theUrbanDryad · 21/01/2008 10:41

things are always more difficult when you're tired.

got to go try and get ds down for a nap now - wil check in in a while. xx

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