Would you confront "cheating" or wait for more evidence ?

[buttergloss]

A few different situations have led me to be suspicious of my partner cheating - I have felt pretty paranoid about this and inferior since my third was born - like I'm no good at anything, don't feel like he is attracted to me anymore .

I went away for a couple of nights and an item of his that had disappeared off the face of the earth had suddenly appeared - this prompted me (wrongly I know ) to turn on the location settings on his phone, left this for a while and no reason to check, the other night he claimed to be going to work early (hours early!) for multiple reasons -he was babbling on and on and his story and no eye contact made me question it , the next day I checked the location settings on his phone -significant locations and it showed he was at a location (residential road of flats and houses converted into apartments/bedsits) about 25 minutes from our house and not in the direction of his work place , he was there for an hour and a half and left in time to make it from there to work at his usual start time.

Would you confront him with this information, obviously I will ask about how work was first and see if he volunteers any info about why he would be at that location or would you say nothing and see if anything else happens ?

Thanks!

You know that you can just leave if you are unhappy. He will follow the cheaters script and deny, project etc etc. He already makes you feel worthless and you don't trust him so I would only confront him if you believe he might be honest or change his behaviour and you also have the capacity to forgive him and continue the relationship.

I’d be tempted to bide my time and next time perhaps follow him so you can see exactly where he goes. It would be easy for him to claim it’s a friends house or something

You know the truth. You don't have to prove it.

Just end the relationship. I know it's not that easy but you don't have to justify it to anyone. You're not happy.

This is not a court of law. The only burden of proof that needs met is the one you decide on for yourself.

Escort?

I would ask how work was.
Do you have kids?

Don’t confront him (you’ve been sly with his phone location settings thing so that’s a can of worms he can turn round on you).

Just leave. You have evidence, and your gut feelings based on his body language and over-explaining.

…Or gaslight him…

“Is your friend okay? The one you mentioned popping round to see when you said you was leaving earlier for work the other day? Is it the one who lives on [name of road]?”

…and then watch his reaction Like A Hawk. And trust your instincts on that.

@ednatheevilwitch that's the thing he doesn't do anything that should make me feel worthless, I think it's just something I have been generally struggling with lately but I'm projecting it and thinking he also feels that I'm no good? So maybe the things that have been making me suspicious are just my paranoia but obviously I can't explain him going to an unknown location at night when he was meant to be at work

@Dotcheck yes we have 3

@DatingDinosaur yes I think if I confront him he could just talk his way out of it or deny and say it was an error with the phones location settings and from only one occasion I have no real proof that it wasn't just a one off glitch. If I didn't have the children I would probably wait until I suspected he was going again and go to the location.