Unhappy

[Cos12345]

Second marriage just three years
Has been bullying and controling so many episodes of ignoring me I walk on egg shells constantly. Has tried to cut off my friends, sulks if I try to go out without him. He has left me on my own in town when he has drunk calling me all sorts of names
Will not talk to me for weeks on end
I've finally had enough I'm so scared to tell him.
We live in what was my former marital home he's not in the mortgage
I just want out I'm so unhappy and scared

file for divorce you only get one life

Thanks- I just need to work out how to tell him, he won't leave the house I know he'll be really awful and difficult

I would speak to Womens Aid first, they will advise you on safest way, but if he becomes threatening call the police and they will get him out. You shouldn't have to live your life in fear, get a restraining order if need be.

yes but he's being awkward and difficult anyway isn't he? So nothing new there! Have you got a friend who can be with you when you tell him?

I spoke to woman's aid yesterday as wasn't sure it was abuse, they were great. Problem is it's the marital home so I don't know if I can keep him out, he'll refuse to go and living in silence is so emotionally exhausting. Yes I have friends that will support me

This is what I've realised and coming to terms with it's so hard

It works both ways, you're entitled to half of his assets too. Time to start gathering financial information . In fact, I'd do that quietly, before I told him about the divorce.

He has none, it's all in my name

You married a man with no assets? Not even a pension?

I would speak to a solicitor. Considering the home was yours outright before you married him and you've only been with him a short time, he may not be entitled to much of whats yours.

You can also report him to the police for controlling and abusive behaviour.

No he had rented for years. He has a pension for right years. My assets are more, I didn't think when we got married that we would be at this point

Thanks. I feel stupid about the controlling behaviour, and don't know how I prove it. My daughter's and best friends know

Well it would be up to the police to prove, if they felt there was enough to go on. Even if they didn't, I suppose at least it would be handy for them to have a report on file. Because he will do it to the next woman too.

But for now just focus on getting him out and getting free of him. It only takes one person to end a relationship. If you say its over, it's over. He doesn't get a say, it's not a negotiation zeemeber that. If he won't leave and gets threatening, call the police.

Thanks. I'm going to call solicitor when I can, then get house valued,I don't want anything from the house he can take whatever is his and anything we have got together, I just want to finish feeling like this.