Obsessed with her exs?

[castleonthehillll]

We are in the early days of dating (4 months )
Both female
She talks about her ex's a lot.
I feel like I know their life story
Every ex I have seen pictures of (well Facebook accounts )
She tells me story's of ex partners going back years.
She tells me a ex got married to make her jealous.
She got into a fight last week whilst out (claims she was innocent ) and says if her ex finds out she will go crazy (because she got hurt and she hates anyone hurting her)
Hate in mind this ex is off 10 years plus ago and has kids and married now.
At first I thought it was just when she had a drink...but nope it's sober too.
It's like in her head all her ex's still want her...

I find it odd don't you?

That is seriously concerning. Obviously she isn't over them and needs some closure to move on. Have you spoken to her about how she makes you uncomfortable?

No I haven't
It's not just 1 ex ..it's all of them.
There's about 5 she talks about
Then she will bang on about her 1 night stands

sounds like she is massively insecure - I would get rid.

Bin her. Honestly anyone wittering on about their exes is just a big old red flag.

What's worrying for me is how she's so convinced these ex's are actually bothered anymore

Trying to make you jealous? Narcissistic? Either way, massively insecure and a whole buntingfull of red flags

Strongly advise you to be one of her exs ASAP. She can't live in the now with you so she'll not be able to fit in your future. It's not you, it's her!

If a man (or woman) did this it would be so unacceptable. Don't put up with it. Leave, this is not for you

You shouldn't have to put up with that @castleonthehillll

I don't want to self diagnose but from what I've read I think she's narcissistic
Do you think she will grow out of it?

She wont grow out of it OP, she is a very insecure person. Not one for you to keep going with. Politely move away from this relationship and move on with your life. Your self esteem will take a hit and your relationship will be damaged. Not worth it. Leave her in her world of exes where she seems to like to live in her head. She lives in the past and not the present. Find someone who lives in the moment with you and no one else.

I've just posted something similar- how weird - I stayed, believe me you should go..I had history to keep me shackled you don't.

She sounds really insecure and it's such a shame. Dunno if it's narcissism but she is a troubled person and needs help, but doubt she will seek it. You could try asking her about it and if she is adamant that it's true, I'd give up and move on. You'll waste your life trying to fix her otherwise.

No,No,No.

You don’t sound like you like her. Bare minimum of being with someone, no?

Of course I like her but I'm not going to pretend when we are together and she's banging on about ex's ...it doesn't hurt my feelings
I try and put it to the back of my head but obviously I get worried

“I don’t want to hear ever again one single word about your exes, it’s hurtful for me and I have zero interest in them”. End of.

try this.

if this doesn’t work then it means a) she’s not over them thus a proper relationship with her impossible or b) she’s narcissistic, deeply insecure and trying to triangulate you with the exes. Both possibilities your relationship is doomed so dump her ASAP. You will be part of the exes “she never got over” and will talk tirelessly about you to her next girlfriend.

I know it can be slim pickings out there in lesbian dating op but surely to god you can do better than this self-obsessed pillock?

Red flag 101

Very immature. How old is she? I'd find it embarrassing and it would put me right off her. Trying to make you jealous maybe but who cares? It's really weird she is so over invested and that she knows so much about these people...and that in itself would be enough for me to leave 🤐

Run don't look back

No offence but you need to get rid of this bitter scorned woman and find yourself a nice girl.They do exist 😂Good luck.