I feel really used ...does anyone understand?

[railbailsail]

I won't go on about it but I just need to write it down and for someone to just understand a little.
I met a guy and I was happy and unfortunately it was past fixing but I still wanted him but the situation meant we would never work (I won't go into detail but too many outside forces and bad stuff )
Anyway we continued to be "friends"
We spoke every single day,texts,phone calls.
Told me everything that was happening in his life..spent every day talking.
Still tho he loved making me jealous (where he is a bit of a prick )
We were "friends" for over a year after not being together.
We ended up having a argument and fell out and nothing for a month.
We started speaking
Then a month later he started ignoring my texts.
I asked what was wrong
He said (actual words )
"There's no need for us to speak again,I'm seeing someone,there's no need for me and you to speak again"
I said "I thought we were friends,we've spoken daily for 18 months"
He replied "we are not and never have been friends,there's no need for any further messages"

That was it
He was gone
We spoke daily for 18 months but he isn't even my friend?
We have been a couple but that's all I was worth ?
I feel used

He did use you, so I'm not surprised you felt that way.

He used you for emotional and social contact, and for an ego boost, knowing that you wanted more.

He's treated you very cruelly and as something to be disposed of without a second thought the moment a better option appeared.

He's a bastard and I hope you block him and never speak to him again.

There is someone out there who deserves your love and kindness, and now that Mr Dickhead isn't wasting your time and energy, you're free to find him. 🌸

My turn!
He pursued me relentlessly for many months, I finally gave in and even opened my heart a little and suddenly one day , about 10 days later after, I can't get through to him on WhatsApp, phone or anything (the dreaded single tick)
Thoughts range from, what have I done wrong, were all his compliments fake, through to, has he lost his phone/been mugged/ hospital?/jail?

1 week later I find I'm unblocked and agree to meet him in town. Needed a week to sort his head out etc. Oh and can I lend him some money. Right OK

To cut a long story short I found out a few days later he'd spent the week with his ex girlfriend, but for it to alsoseem like he unblocked me cause he was broke is really too much ...

It’s shitty but given how many women on MN say they’d never allow their OH to have female friends or consider a man and a woman texting each other to be an automatic precursor to an emotional affair - whatever that is - I think it’s highly likely the new girlfriend has told him he’s not to stay in touch with you.

And if you’re honest with yourself, were you actually friends? It sounds more as though you were hoping for a relationship and hung around texting in the hope he’d change his mind and want that too. I think you’ll be a lot happier with him out of your life.

It's that feeling of just being disposed
That I wasn't worth anything
If things had worked out different we probably would have worked but I guess it wasn't to be

It’s shitty but given how many women on MN say they’d never allow their OH to have female friends or consider a man and a woman texting each other to be an automatic precursor to an emotional affair - whatever that is - I think it’s highly likely the new girlfriend has told him he’s not to stay in touch with you.

THIS.

Of course he used you. He was seeing other women and wanted you to know so he could hurt you. What is that if not abuse?
Get as far away from him as you can

I agree. Be glad you didn’t get more involved with this pr*ck, and better luck next time.

Maybe he just wants nothing to get in the way of his new relationship so is choosing the woman he is seeing over a woman he was leading up the garden path? Be happy, be free and meet someone who will see your worth.

His closing texts may well have been dictated to him by his new gf. Or supervised at least

For your own mental health maybe you should block him? It sounds nasty but it's just protecting yourself and helping you move forward. Unless he's really bad at handling things it does sound like he wanted to hurt you. Otherwise he could have said friendship isn't going to work and it's best for you both to sever completely and move on.

Maybe he doesn't actually try to contact you again. Maybe his new relationship has issues and he comes back to you because you are there and willing or hopeful of a friendship or something more. He might do the same thing all over again.

When he comes into your mind try to do or think of something else. I know you said it might have worked if your circumstances had been different but I think as he has shown a cruel side, he would have shown it later had you been together.

I think blocking him is a good idea. On everything I think.
Altogether we have dated/spoken daily for 2 1/2 years...I honestly miss talking to him.
I'm lost-but he wasn't