I'll keep this short - if you found out that your OH was smoking weed secretly, how would you react? His moods have been so up and down and he snaps at the slightest thing at times, but once he is away and does his own thing (smokes weed) then he's absolutely fine. He doesn't know I know he smokes, but a message came up on his phone when I was using it (he was fully aware I was using it) which made me think and I will say I did then go into the messages at a later date and read them to confirm my suspicions. Our marriage is not great - we hardly spend more than 5 mins together and then I always feel I am walking on egg shells. I never see him smile, I try to be loving but it's thrown back in my face. He never looks at me the way he used to. Maybe I am just being selfish, we have a toddler, most of my time is spent looking after him or working (I have my own business), so maybe I need to give him more attention but quite frankly I have no umph to do so. I really don't know what I am asking for in this post, I suppose I just want to get things written down and off my chest. How can I get him to admit he smokes weed and start being a better person. He seems angry most of the time, I only see him smiling when he is speaking with his mates.