Work and nursery - feeling stressed. AIBU on dc?

[dstijfld]

I have a decent job and if I’m honest I like being in the office and just having that part of my life.

at the moment ex pays around 680 a month. He doesn’t see dc and so we don’t speak at all, I’ve no idea if that payment will go up or down or what he’s doing with his career. BUT… my question is this…

If I don’t go back to work after maternity I will lose my job. So this means leaving DC when he’s only 1. My mum can do one day, I will only work four days so it leaves three days of dc either being in nursery or with a childminder.

I feel terrible about this. It’s so young isn’t it? And which is best a childminder or a nursery? I want to send them to the nursery at a local private school that I trust but they won’t accept until they’re 2… should I ask anyway? I hate the idea of them not being looked after properly. I feel stressed

I’m also a single mum - my little girl has been in nursery since she was 9 months and now has to go five days a week :(

I feel bad but I need to pay the bills and presumably so do you - so try not to feel guilty. At least it’s only three days so he’s with his family more often than not.

this is pretty standard surely (single parent or not) my daughter has been in nursery 4 days a week since 10 months as we both work.

i felt a bit crap about it initially! Now she’s 18 months and she’s so happy there and she’s become so social and learned so much

honestly don’t feel bad about it

The school will not accept your DC early but, if you are planning to use it in the future, they may well be aware of a family looking to do a nanny-share as their DC start nursery/school. The pre-prep at my school were always fantastic at linking nannies with families to suit both sides.

I need to return to work in January and feel so worried. But also know my son will be fine! Start looking at nurseries and find one you like, I've booked DS into my favourite one and I feel confident he'll like it there.

We have no family nearby, DS is in nursery four days a week from 8-5.30 mostly, so that we can work. He’s been there since 9 months.

He loves it. He has absolutely thrived & does activities that I wouldn’t have thought he was old enough to do at home. I’m a better parent for working. It’s a win win.

You don't say how long you have until you are going back to work, if I were you I'd start visiting nurseries and childminders now, get a feel of different places and see what you think will suit you and your DC. Some places have long wait lists so it's best to get a jump on it. Plus you could do some settling in sessions and even shorter sessions before you go back to prepare you both.

My DS has been full time from a year and loves it! I am so happy he is there. They learn so much and have so much more fun than at home. We are really pleased with our nursery though, imagine not all of them are the same.

I don't have to from a financial perspective (we could be comfortable on DH's salary) but I love working and am a better parent with time apart - he gets full attention when i am with him