Something is off

[Whatisthegoss]

I have been in a relationship for 7mths.
An older man 12 year age gap.
I tease him calling him Old. We used to laugh now he tells me it is not ok.

Instead of going out & doing something on weekend he prefers to help tidy my house or I should do this or that.
I prefer to save it for late afternoon or work nights.
I can now predict the days we will spend together
Sunday evenings is prepare for work night
I go out some weeknight evenings and he asks what your going out...yes to buy groceries, he queries for how long and like its unheard of.

He got into a argument and said I am unhappy, is it all his fault Our relationship is on a spiral.
I let jim.know hos comments which annoyed me i am a open book in any issues, he resents it i feel.
I am more bored of the predictability of his set days, lack of spontaneousness and he dwells on especially when drinking that his wife left him (10yrs ago) and his adult children have gone and left him.
I say it is the past but we move on by now not dwell.
What am I missing?
He said we should end it but then a hour later he can not let me go that easily..
I think he is aware we are not ment to be and wont let it go.
I have been told he gaslights me yet he claims to googled it bit has no idea what I am talking about!

If this is what it’s like at 7 months in, what will it be like 3 years down the line?!

Easy for me to say but I’d move on & sharpish.

I don’t think calling him old is very kind at all.
Doesn’t sound like this relationships got legs does it? You’ve got totally different lifestyles and ways of thinking.

Sounds like a shit relationship. I'm assuming you're a grown woman, it's not up for him to "let you go". If you're un happy then you finish it.

He sounds like he’s wasting your time until someone “better” comes along. Don’t settle for it, this isn’t making you happy.

It's not up to him to let you go. It only takes one person to end a relationship. You've ended it because you aren't happy. Good on you, life is too short.

And normal people don't tend to gaslight other people. That behaviour has no place in a relationship. So it sounds like you've had a lucky escape. I mean the guy even gaslighted you about not understanding gaslighting xD

Dump him.

His wife left him? I’m not surprised! I’d leave him too if he was behaving the way you’re describing! Dump him, he’s controlling and imagine if he’s like this after 7 months what he will be like after 7 years.

What am I missing?
He said we should end it but then an hour later he can not let me go that easily..
I think he is aware we are not ment to be and wont let it go.

What are you missing? You're letting him decide, that's what.

Why should he be the one to make the decision? You can choose to end the relationship if you want to. To be honest, it might be for the best, because you want different lifestyles from one another.

Does he have a sense of humour and make you laugh? I would imagine not...Leave him. Go and enjoy life. There are lots more single men out there.

Although it’s handy to have someone to help tidy your house it doesn’t sound like you’re getting anything else out of this relationship. Time to call it a day.

I got sucked into the bs once again.
But I care about you".
I have been backing away and limited time together.
He lost it with me today after I said why do you always patronize me, I'm sick of it..unfortunately in a public place with no one actually hearing me...
I hurt his pride and got yelled at, glared and sworen at, on asking why he needed to do this he said was I not doing the same.
Good bye gaslighting, no man to tell me how to live,dress, every itch of my being critised,, but it's all in my head.
Even not to feed my pet twice a day nor keep the heating on! My house my $.
Oh please leave waste of space angry men who twist it to be all Our fault.
Best is in the thick of it I turned my back and found my lack of fight finally.
I'm done with him.

Unfortunately alittle to long he has played my mind..