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Original poster

Does everyone have a best friend?

21 replies

pregmummy · 20/01/2008 14:10

Just wondered if everyone (except me) has a best friend..? Has never particularly bothered me until recently but now am quite aware that i have noone i can call a B.F. Other people seem to talk about their b.f. quite alot and i cant do that.
I have a couple of long term good friends and quite a few mum friends and acquaintances - but when i have mentioned to people that i dont actaully have a b.f. they have thought it a bit strange. Do you?

OP posts:

SSSandy2 · 20/01/2008 14:11

No I don't think grown ups tend to have a best friend so much. You have some good friends (if you're lucky) and a number of acquaintances

nutcracker · 20/01/2008 14:12

I don't.

I did from the age of about 6 until 18, and I do still see and speak to her, but I wouldn't say she is my best friend anymore as we are no longer close.

I think people tend to either have a best friend or groups of good friends.

DD2 has a best friend, whereas dd1 has lots of good friends and is close to all of them.

Shitemum · 20/01/2008 14:14

i have a couple of friends ive known for years and i like them for different reasons. One i might call my best friend but i dont know if i am hers! We hardly get a chance to see each other these days.
Isn't your DP your best friend?

cory · 20/01/2008 17:18

I've got lots of good friends, but not really a best friend, at least not a woman.

geekgirl · 20/01/2008 17:29

I think dh is my 'best friend'.
I do have a couple of very good female friends, but I wouldn't 'grade' them . TBH I think it's a bit weird to still have the 'best friend' thing going on in adulthood...

PeachesMcLean · 20/01/2008 17:32

I think you're very lucky if you have a best friend at my age. I don't think it's odd, I rather envy it.

dooley1 · 20/01/2008 17:37

I have some very good friends but unfortunately I met them at uni and schoolso now see them twice a year if I'm lucky.
Have one good friend from work but that was after years of never seeing work people outside work.
In terms of who knows me best, who I tell everything too I guess dh would be the closest to a best friend
Close to my sibings too but they live a 3 hour car journey away along with my parents

andiemustlosehalfastonemore · 20/01/2008 17:42

I have two 'best friends' hate that term one I went to school with and one I went to uni with
one lives in cornwall I am in london and one in australia
I suppose I would call them best friends because
they know everything about me and vice versa
they have seen me through thick and thin
we talk at least once a week
I know I could tell them anything and they would give me honest good advice
I see my friend in cornwall about 6 times a year and my friend in aus about once every 5 years
I am also guardian to their children
I don't have a sister and I think that is why they are so important to me
I also have friends from ds1 school that i see more regularly but I just don't have the shared history with them iyswim

NAB3wishesfor2008 · 20/01/2008 17:50

My DH is my best friend. I have about 3 good friends and a few other just regular friends.

notalone · 20/01/2008 18:31

I have about 5 really good friends but not a best friend as such and these friends don't live near me anymore. I always had a best friend up until about 18 but I moved away and our lives just went in different directions. We are still friends but are not close anymore. I am lucky though - with three of my friends we are very close and we never end a phone call without an "I love you"

I do wish I still had a "best friend" though. Where I am living now I am conscious of not having any close friends. I have a few aquaintances but no-one I could call in an emergency in the middle of the night etc

yetanothername · 20/01/2008 19:05

I have a best friend who I've been friends with since we were best mates at school, lo these many years ago, which is probably why I still call her my best friend! We have a laugh at ourselves about using the term though!

My sis doesn't have a "best friend" probably cos the people she's close to she became friends with as an adult.

McDreamy · 20/01/2008 19:06

I have a best friend who I trained with but I also have a handful of very close female friends too.

themoon66 · 20/01/2008 19:09

I have a few close friends, but only one I could call 'best'. She is 20 years older than me but we are like peas in a pod in terms of our lives and the way they have run.

Rhubarb · 20/01/2008 19:09

I think best friends are very hard to come by. I met mine when we were 12. We were in the same secondary and just hit it off, we're still best friends today and have supported each other through various crises. I see her more of a sister than a friend and I hope she does too.

I also have other friends who have become close friends because they've had stuff going on in their lives and I've been there for them, and vice versa.

But at our age it's hard to make friends as everyone already has their social circles. But it's still possible. Just go out there, get involved, be a good listener. There's plenty of time yet!

fairylights · 20/01/2008 19:11

i dont have a best friend - i have some wonderful friends who i am close to and really trust but we all live in different places so there is not the immediacy of how i perceive a best friend to be. Sometimes makes me a bit sad but actually i am happy in life so sure its fine!

wheelybug · 20/01/2008 19:14

I truly think of DH as my best friend but other than that I have a few very close/good friends I have met at various stages of life who I would count as my best friends - one from school, 2 from university, 1 from a masters degree (who I met my DH through as he lived with her now husband and we see them regularly so they are our best friends as a couple) and 1 who I have met since having a child. As a child I also had grous of very close friends rather than 1.

muppetgirl · 20/01/2008 19:16

I have. We met at Uni (nearly 11 years ago ) She is the sister I never had. Godmother to my two boys and will have them if anything were to happen to Dh and myself.
She's fab

princessmel · 20/01/2008 19:19

I have a best friend. That I've known since primary school . Well 2 actually. One's my twin sister. And lots of close friends plus lots of mummy/school mum friends.
I think I'm very lucky to have so many friends. I see one of my friends most days and usually have the next week booked up with meet ups, either to their house, my house or toddlers, soft play etc( not every day). I prefer to be seeing people than alone. For some part of the day anyway.
I would always have someone I could text/call for a chat or a meet up. I love my friends.
I do make friends easily though. I talk to anyone.

OrmIrian · 20/01/2008 19:20

No. If anyone is it's my DH. Although we have very little time together these days. He shares me life so is more tolerant of neglect than any female friend I've ever had. I have some very good friends that I don't see for months at a time. And friends that I 'share' with DH. But not best friends. Also I like my own company - in other words I'm a miserable bugg*r.

Maveta · 20/01/2008 19:20

I would count 3 people as my ´best friends´, one is my sister and the other 2 were schoolfriends, we all starting ´hanging out´ at about 14 but weren´t particularly close until we all went to the same uni (away from hometown). Even then it was a very seperate and special friendship between the 3 of us. We all also had our own groups of friends and social life and these rarely overlapped. We are very different but we´ve been friends for 15 years now, through each of us going off travelling for long periods, marriages, affairs, babies, me moving abroad. I still see them once a year (either they come to me or I to them) and we talk on the phone when we can. No matter how long it´s been we are always the same and we all give each other the space to be ourselves with no pressure to be a certain way. We would all be there for the others in a heartbeat and I love them.

My dh is also a ´best friend´ and apart from these 4 very important people I have other friends, but no one that comes close to them in terms of people I could tell all to.. etc etc.

To answer your op I wouldn´t think it was strange for a person not to have a best friend. I do think to use that term usually you´d have to have known the person from childhood because I wouldn´t apply it to any of the friends I´ve met in adulthood, irrespective of how close we were.

WinkyWinkola · 20/01/2008 22:37

I used to have a best friend when I was at school. We're still pals now but we lives 100's of miles apart.

I used to have four or five people I considered really close friends before I got married.

We're all married now with children and see much less of each other as we're so busy. We're still friends but I tend not to confide in anyone these days unless it's my mum.

So, no, I don't have a best friend. I've not met anyone that I really click with.. .. . . I don't have the time right now to invest in a 'best friend'.

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