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Original poster

Medication to get over/forget someone

6 replies

pats555 · 05/08/2022 00:46

I know it sounds extreme, but it has been 14 years since I ruined my life. I broke up with the most amazing women (who is now a loving mother of 3) and loved me and wanted to marry me (we were 26 at the time, I'm 39 now). I was wondering if there was anything medically wise to get over this. I don't want to call it trauma because people experience way worse in life, but was hoping there was something to make it seem like we never met. I'm pretty sure I know the answer but it can't help to ask.

OP posts:
Original poster
pats555 · 05/08/2022 00:46

I should also note we were together for 8 years.

OP posts:
RiverSkater · 05/08/2022 00:52

Sounds like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, which was fiction I'm afraid.

You broke up with her for a reason ??

Counselling to help you move forward. Have you not been with anybody since? This is very sad.

NewBootsAndRanty · 05/08/2022 00:55

Radical acceptance therapy?

RiverSkater · 05/08/2022 00:57

Maybe you could try Hypnotherapy?

manova366 · 05/08/2022 01:45

I think you know that there's no medication to erase an event from the past.
Your own mind is the tool you need to use.
"Sliding Doors" is just a fantasy.
Life is more like a crazy maze.
In all likelihood, that relationship would've had the same shit going on inside it as any other relationship.
If you haven't already:


  • detach from any connection to her on social media. I'd bet any money you follow her obsessively which is not helping you. How do you know she's a "loving mother of 3"? She likely has the same averagely shitty/contented life as the average mother

  • write about your experience in order to process your memories of the relationship - good, bad, mediocre

  • see a counsellor for grief therapy

  • shift your attention to other relationships, interests, activities, work, so you are less likely to ruminate on something that happened 14 years ago

  • don't put responsibility for your life being ruined on a relationship (and a woman on a pedestal) that you think would have somehow made your life perfect. It's your responsibility, and it's your responsibility to get over it

  • focus on seeing the life you've got as worth living instead of believing you ruined your life by not pursing one relationship ages ago.

sausage767 · 05/08/2022 01:53

OP, if only that were possible. Eternal Sunshine is my favourite movie.

The medication you are looking for is focusing on your own life. You are still young and a happy future is waiting for you if you don't spend all your time and energy looking back into the past.

Some therapy could probably help you, to give you strategies to cope with these intrusive thoughts, if they take over and you get lost in them.

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