Gave it all to the wrong man

[Sahnel]

In my early thirties and met someone I fell for. I was surprised and relived, thinking I had finally found that ‘happy ending’ whatever that is. Pregnant unexpectedly (not intentional!) and by the end of pregnancy he had made clear that actually, a family was never want he would wanted with me, despite it being a large part of our conversations and him saying he desperately wanted a family as he was pushing 40.

I just feel like a bit of a wash up. I was so excited for a future together and he turned out not to actually want to put into practice all the things he had passionately talked about with me. He was reluctant to go on holidays, mini breaks, see each other’s family more than once a year, never wanted to see my friends. I only met his once in two years. It was all just really weird. Sex was intermittent and rarely initiated by him but he was happy for me to go down on him often. I just feel like this absolute idiot who really wanted to have a brilliant relationship and when it came to it basically he couldn’t be arsed.

Hes never bothered with DC (2) and whilst I’m happy I have dc I feel like I was so stupid to give my all to someone who could have been so fake. Even his initial dating profile was about all the things we clicked about yet he never was that person.

I don’t know why I’m posting I just feel like I will never have the chance again for a full relationship. Having a miserable eve wishing it could have been different.

You are still SO young. There is still so much time to meet someone special and, more importantly, there is so much time to just enjoy your life. You also have a child out of this, who I am sure you love to pieces.

He wasn't who you thought he was, and that's a real shame, but that's a reflection him. Don't let him make you miserable for any longer.

All those holidays and mini breaks you've talked about, do them! Take your child on those adventures and make some memories.

The past has happened and you can't change it. But there is such a beautiful stretch of future ahead of you.

You are young, you have a wonderful child, look on the bright side, at least you are not saddled with this loser. X

I'm sorry your ex turned out not to be the man you had hoped he was, but it sounds like you've dodged a bullet and frankly it's better that he cleared off. You have a child so you don't need to be driven by your biological clock; you have plenty of time to find someone who's much better for you. It may not be easy at the moment with a 2 year old, but it sounds like you are ready for a full relationship and have a lot to give. You sound like a giver. Get out there and find someone worthy of you .

Ditto and he says the word but didn't do the things.
Guess what..life with my fabulous 4 year old is brilliant. Better without a milestone round my neck of my ex.
His loss op, genuinely, his loss

Old is full of these guys
Playing captain hindsight wont change a thing
You did the best with the information you had at the time
It was his remit to change the narrative and pull the rug from under your feet
He is the loser - not you

Congratulations on your beautiful child and getting away from this loser
Dont feed into the patriachies nonsense that 'your too this or too that' to find love

I work with the general public every dat and you have just as much chance as anyone to find your happiliy ever after