Reunion

[missunsociable]

I went to school with someone who
I was quite friendly with in secondary school. She left before I turned 13.

After that my life was hell. Physical and mental abuse at home, going off the rails and the girls I had been friends with being nasty. I hated school but managed to turn things around when I'd finished my GCSEs.

The friend that left keeps trying to arrange school reunions. I've tried to be polite about not being interested. I am in touch with people I was friends with and I would regard them as lovely genuine friends but most of them were not in my class at school or live far away.

I'm wondering whether to just be upfront yet subtle about why I don't want to go to a reunion. Any suggestions?

Why have you been reluctant to tell her the truth about why you wouldn’t attend a reunion? You don’t have to give her any graphic details but enough to make it clear that you are not interested. If after telling her the truth she keeps banging on or tries to persuade you, be firm and tell her you won’t change your mind and she’s risking your friendship by ignoring your wishes.

Communicate your boundaries and Police them when necessary.

Eh? Just tell her you don't fancy it. There'll be loads of people telling her the same.

Yes my year had a reunion in 2016. I said I didn’t fancy it, as did the majority, but some went along and looked to have had a nice time.

The thing is the organiser keeps approaching me directly about the reunions as I was part of the gang to begin with. She is unaware of the bitch fest after she left.

Why don’t you feel able to just tell her what happened to you? That seems like the obvious thing to do.

This - just have a conversation with her particularly if you were friends before she left

Just say straight - it isn't something youd be interested in if you change your mind you'll let her know but pls stop asking

I'd spell it out without detail

''not all of those memories are good''.