PLEASE HELP!!!!

[Sxox]

Hi guys

sooo… I think sometimes the best advice is from absolutely strangers and I so desperately need this.

so am a mum too two beautiful twin girls. They are Seven. Me and there dad spilt when they where two which was an awful spilt but I got on my feet again and was single for two years.. I then met my current partner… Dave he’s amazing an amazing guy so amazing with my girls we’ve been together about two years now. Thing is I’ve fallen out of love with him completely I’ve felt this way for about 4months now but keep holding on hoping it might come back the “love” I felt at the start. I was planning on ending things but then he had to have major surgery and now has a stoma which has resulted in bag. I’ve supported him throughout that helped him bathed him etc but I genuinely can’t help this feeling of being totally miserable and just not having thoses feelings. I’ve asked for some space and he’s saying he will end his life he doesn’t have a life without me and kids now am feeling majorly guilty and bringing his stomabag into it but I was having theses feelings way before that happened. I work in care theses things dont bother me I don’t care about the “bag” I just feel trapped. I’ve been crying all day and don’t no what to do. I feel responsible like am I a terrible person? What should I do.
everyone’s going to think am ending it because of the stomabag but I’ve had theses feelings for months. I feel genuine guilty

thanks guys xoxo

You aren't a terrible person. You've fallen out of love with your partner. It happens. It isn't in your control.

It is unfortunate timing that he then became ill, but being a decent person you hung around to support him through the worst of that. You can't now stick around together because you would feel guilty leaving him. It would be much worse to stay with someone you no longer love.... horrible for you, not fair on him (he should be free to find someone who loves him) and not a good model to show your children.

You know it's not about his illness and his op. If he chooses not to believe that you can't control that, but you know the truth and you can make sure that your children know it too.

If he threatens to kill himself if you leave, he's controlling and cruel. Don't stay because he makes such threats. It would be the wrong reason to stay and not good for either of you. If he makes such threats, tell the police and let them check on him. He can seek help if he needs support through your break up. You absolutely can't stay with someone you no longer love because of mis-placed guilt.

Two years is often a turning point in a relationship. I've noticed it's often make or break. I think it's the time when love matures from being 'in love' to actually loving the other person as a partner. Perhaps some questions would give you more clarity.
Can you pinpoint a reason or trigger for your feelings? How long have his health problems been going on? Will his stoma be reversed? I'm just wondering if you being his carer has sapped the romance? Perhaps you feel like your home life is too much like you work?
I would think you've both been through so much and had a lot of stress over the past few months it would be difficult to be all loved up.
If you think of your life without him how do you feel? Relief, sadness, less stress, unburdened?