Divorce

[ChiBox]

Any guidance appreciated, husband has left. Been gone 3 weeks, says hes coming back then hes not.

I've had enough, but I don't know what to do, I dont want him back. I dont want him in the house but it's owned jointly. Can I keep him out?

I have an appointment next weds with a solicitor for advice. I don't want a divorce but equally enough is enough.

My head is spinning

If you don't want him back and you don't want him in your house you've done the hard bit - you've made up your mind and that takes some guts

However you say you don't want a divorce? That would usually follow suit as he owns half the house you will either have to buy him out his share or put it on the market to sell.

My friend was in the same situation - husband cleared off to other woman's house, it was out on the market - he split up with other woman and said he wasn't paying rent anywhere else while it sold as it was dead money and he moved back in after 6-8 weeks and there was nothing she could do about it as he wasn't a threat to her or violent and he was, on paper, living in the house he owned and it took ages to sell they did that for about 7-8 months but once it sold they split the profits and they both moved on.

If you have joint savings I suppose these could be used to cover the rent somewhere else but my friend and her ex husband didn't have many savings

Sorry posted too soon

Didn't have many savings so that wasn't an option

I'd say see what the solicitor says at the appointment

I hope it all works out for you but if it was me I'd want to divorce him and get everyone financially and otherwise all sorted out

Thank you, I don't want a divorce but also not chasing someone who is so cruel after 17yrs. I can't afford to buy him out. I dont want him back sweetalking me and making out I'm the issue.

Just want him to stay away but I know he won't.

Make sure the bank knows and any savings /other accounts you have are blocked. Keep the one that pays mortgage and bills open.

@SkeletonFight thanks I've done that today.

Why don’t you want a divorce?

@GreenFingersWouldBeHandy because I don't understand what's happened. Because I'm mad at myself for putting up with his workaholic arse. Guess divorce means I wasn't worth it.

I’d say the opposite. Divorce means you know you’re worth better than this piece of crap.

@GreenFingersWouldBeHandy ok. I needed that way of looking at it! That's a great thought for me- thank you

Spot on!

I dont want him in the house but it's owned jointly. Can I keep him out?
not really, it’s his house as much as yours and he is entitled to live in it still.