I have been completely ostracised & I'm really hurt.

[LemonSunchines]

I sent a happy message to a much loved family member. I'm going to change the details so it's not outing. But something like 'I'm going to buy you a gift'. Only the message appears to have been read back-to-front and received as 'I'm never going to buy you a gift'. The receiver of my message has gone apoplectic. They sent me a long missive remonstrating with me for my 'extreme selfishness & lack of consideration for others for not buying said gift' etc etc. In their anger, they've gone around telling a few people about my message & I've been blocked on several fronts. I was beside myself with shock when I got their reply & in tears at their vitriol. I tried to phone to iron things out but I'm not being answered. I feel absolutely terrible as I've done nothing wrong. I can't iron out this complete misunderstanding if everyone keeps their back to me. There is no-one to act as a go-between, so I guess I just have to sit and suffer for as long as this lasts.

I've never experienced anything like this before with this person.

This happened to me once, and the person cut me off entirely. Several years later I had a conversation with her husband and he took her side, but when I explained, the two of them re-read my letter and immediately realized they had read it wrongly and apologized. Up until then, nothing I tried to do made any difference. Maybe you have to give it some time and try again later.

None of this makes sense. So one person misunderstands a text, immediately turns against you and manages to turn others against you? And none of these people said, 'Gosh how weird why would LemonSunshines have sent you that odd text, sounds unlikely.' They all just accepted it? And immediately went as far as to ostracise you??

Then surely either these people are massive drama queens (and thick as shit) and I would dial down contact going forwards (who needs this level of melodramatics in their life!). Or you do actually at times act in an unpleasant way and this was the straw that broke the camels back. i.e you may not have meant something negative this time, but your previous behavior made them readily believe it.

Very odd.

It makes no sense at all.

Highly doubt that op will be back.

I just thought of one scenario that might explain it, and might explain your rather odd comment of "I don't need an apology, I'd just like to give them a hug, tell them I love them".

This 'much loved family member' is actually a bully who everyone, including you, tip toes around, trying to keep them happy. Who has created a really fucked up dynamics in your family. (I am totally guessing here of course!)

Anyway OP, hope you can sort it out, or at least get clarity on what the real problem is. Because it definitely goes beyond a misunderstanding about a text.

I could not be bothered with this amount of drama in my life. Stop crawling around them begging for approval.......I can guarantee this idiot will know exactly what they're doing and will be enjoying every second. Get on with your life and.leave them to get on with theirs.