Friends. Or lack thereof... 😕

[BlackLeatherLagoon]

After realising that I only ever see my friends if I make contact to arrange something, I decided to sit back back see what would happen if I didn't make the first move this year.

And the answer is - not a single one has contacted me. Not one. Now before I'm told that it's my own fault for ignoring them, I've made all the contact, all the suggestions and all the arrangements for the past few years. I'm the one who messages to check in and see how they are. This year, I decided to wait and see what would happen if I didn't. I've been so busy with work, I hadn't really noticed that I'd not heard from them.

I've relented and messaged a ccouple but the messages have gone unread, let alone unanswered, for days now despite them having been online.

Fuck it. Who needs friends..? 🤷🏻‍♀️

I am in the same position @BlackLeatherLagoon so you have my sympathy.

It's my birthday today and even my boyfriend hasn't bothered to call me.

It's a horrible realisation to come to.

Happy birthday, onceupon are you doing anything nice for yourself?

It's shit isn't it!

I mean, I could understand if it was one or two but all of them?

You really really need new friends.

Are they friends from a period in yur life that has changed (e.g. ex workmates, baby-group, school gate mums) I do think some friends are for a season in your life, not forever.

IME, the lasting friendships are those people you share a passion with. your passion for whatever doesn't fade, so the friendship doesn't.

I also find that good friendship can evolve incredibly slowly - decades rather than months or years. When I had a crisis I was surprised torealise the person I most wanted to discuss it with was someone I had only ever seen in the context of two shared hobbies. We were close due to two shared passions but had never had a coffee catch up in our lives.

Get out and do stuff you love doing. Better friends will grow from that, and you'll enjoy yourself in the meantime.

Thanks @BlackLeatherLagoon and nope nothing. Been at work.

@goldfinchonthelawn has a point. Not all friends are for a lifetime.

I have a couple of good friends who buck the trend but we don't live local tonesch other.

My issue is i have moved about a lot so out of sight out of mind I think.

Happy birthday to you! Dump the boyfriend. You deserve better xx

I echo another pp. These people are definitely not your friends. Time to find people who actually appreciate you.

Yes op same. I joined new things. Got tired of chasing. She would never suggest a catchup so if I dont text.. so I didnt. That was January. Im tired of one sided friendships now. Long friendship