I split up with ex-h 6 years ago when kids were 7 and 5. In the scheme of things, it was fairly amicable although we always had problems (literally no sex ever, he never wanted to spend time with me and the kids, he constantly complained of anxiety and stress). Over the years, I've framed it in my mind that we just weren't right for each other. We share the kids 50/50. They like him and he lives 30 mins away - about an hour by public transport.
However, recently I've noticed that he's becoming really controlling of the children. He's afraid to leave our teenager alone in the house and takes and picks him up from school everyday - even though all his friends are doing and navigating simple bus journeys. With our youngest he's constantly going on about how bright he is (to the detriment of the eldest). I can see it's causing problems between the kids - with one believing he's so much smarter than the other. I've also noticed when I have the kids he's in constant communication with them - either texting or calling. I never feel like I can just get on and be a parent. He says he just likes his kids but to me it feels like he just wants to be the favoured parent. He's also talking about moving closer to us. It literally makes my stomach turn thinking about it. His constant defence is "his poor children" whenever I express an opposing view. I don't know if I'm being unfair or not but would love to know if anyone has navigated a situation like this.