Shouldn't I be appreciative?

[lucidtennis]

I met my DH when I was 16, we were friends for 3 years and then started seeing each other when I was 19. DH is older by 8 years, he was 27, grounded and in a stable job. I was taken aback at his maturity and how much he wanted to be settled together. We ended up marrying when I was 22 and he was 30.

Fast forward to today, I'm 35, DH is 43, we have three children (10, 7, 6), and a stable family environment. Last night we were discussing our youth/young adulthood and I discovered a few things about him I didn't know. People/events that happened in his early 20s. He was able to see the world and experience a lot more of it before he settled down.

I haven't really questioned the age gap before, but after last night's conversation, I feel like I've lost a valuable part of my youth where you explore and figure out yourself as a person. Is there anyone else who is happy but regrets settling down too early?

I think it is an issue, probably more to do with getting to know myself and finding my passions/interests and actually developing that didn't happen because I settled young including having DC. It's more of an issue now the DC are flying the nest and I'm much older tbh.

No. I had both my DDs before I was 20. I was married, had a house and a mortgage when I was 18. I’d only ever been to a nightclub once, never been to a gig and we had very little money. I was divorced before I was 30. Do not regret any of it. I’ve been to Uni, run my own businesses, made a lot of money. ( years later I married a moron, that was a mistake but both DDs were at boarding school so saw little of him; it was a brief marriage) Both DDs got degrees, careers they’re happy in, happy marriage and partnership. They’re both wonderful mothers.
As they’d both left home by the time I was 42 I’ve been able to travel around Africa and all over Europe, I lived in the Middle East for two years, done everything I’ve wanted to do.
Getting married and becoming a mum so young doesn’t look great on paper but it worked for me and my kids.

Yes but you will have a whole load of life when the kids are grown.

Just think how much you can enjoy your life with your husband once the children are older and you’re still young!

Exploring and figuring out aren't always what they are cracked up to be op.
Your early years sound quite enviable ime.
Early 20's I was in an abusive relationship and just didn't know it.