How do I manage this situationship ?
Stuck on a situationship
I was seeing this divorced guy for two months and he’s a lot older than me in his late thirties and I am in my mid twenties. We seldom meet and usually meet once a week or so mon-wed and he had to go out of the country for work on Thursday-sun. But whenever we meet is usually at his house chilling or going to bars to drink, and he only asked me out on one dinner date so far and usually always asking me out impromptu cause of his schedule. He’s incredibly busy man who run his own crypto gaming company. Recently he went to Philippines for the whole 2 weeks and came back recently and on the day itself at midnight, he ask me out to drink with him on a short notice and I got upset because I thought he’s just keeping me around to suit him and fit in his schedule and we had an argument, he thought I was being dramatic and don’t want the drama and told me not to go drink with him that day n he was passive aggressive. I confessed and bring up the serious topics and he told me to focus on myself and he is just taking things slow. He said I was the literally the first to message and was the first that came into his mind whenever he has the free time. He told me we are on different frequencies. He said he’s not the best person and he said he really like me and would rather stop now if I think he’s just being sexual about it or worst think we can have long term. He said I’m beautiful , intelligent, young and full of opportunities that a relationship with him would just stop and that he wasn’t arrogant to think that it was all him . He said he was very lucky to meet me. He apologized for leading me on and he said he might have crossed the line. He said he didn’t judged me for sleeping with him that early. He said he will not date until he’s settled -work wise. Like another 3-5 years in an engagement or marriage perspective and it doesn’t mean that he’s fking around.
That he’s so busy, it’s not fair and someone like me definitely need more love.He message me all these things and then want to meet me the following week and told me he misses me. I drunk texted him a few days after he messaged me and practically told him about guys hitting on me and my ex texting me out of the blue and that he needs to step up but he kind of took it out of context and told me it’s doing the opposite effect and he told me if I have other ppl stepping up for me, it’s probably better for me to be with them. Like his advice to me which was to focus on me - if I am not happy, how do I
make someone happy. And how can i really love another if I
don’t love myself
first. He said he’s currently focus on him and what’s he trying to achieve. I said I have moved on from my ex to progress things with him but he replied with only a smiley face. The things that frustrates me a lot was his inconsistencies in texting , me being left on read for many hours and even days even tho I told him I don’t like being left on read and I would be double texting most of the time, and that he didn’t like to use condom whenever we had sex and I told him to go for checkup but he didn’t so I went instead. In the end I told him I don’t want to see him for next few weeks and he should stop texting me this time and when he do ask me out in near future, I might be here, might not be and that we should just be friends without the benefits. He replied he totally understand and totally fine with that. That was the end of our convo, I have not seen him for more than 3 weeks. It hurts like hell :( I’m confused on what to do cause I like him so much.