My brother is 21 and since leaving school at 16 he has kind of just floated around. He gets part-time jobs and then ends up missing so much work that he ends up getting fired. His attendance at work is always awful, he misses more days than he is in. He only ever works part-time and spends the rest of the time smoking weed and hanging around with his friends. He has IBS which is what he claims causes him to miss work a lot, but he will call in sick and then head straight out with his friends so it's not like he's confined to being at home as he's having a flare-up. I think he maybe gets a nervous stomach on mornings he has work and he thinks it's an IBS flare.
I'm 2 years older than him and currently living at home for a variety of reasons, and he is incredibly difficult to live with. I'm not sure if it's just normal for boys his age to be incredibly selfish or whether there's something more with him? For example, he will get up and go in the bathroom to get ready and be in there around an hour each morning. He won't consider whether me or my parents need to get in there to get ready for work. This causes me a lot of anxiety and I've started to get up at 5am just to make sure I can get a shower and get ready before he's awake as there's been a few times where he has made me or one of my parents late for work.
He doesn't contribute towards any rent (I do). My parents often give him money when he asks for it, which I admit I feel a little resentful about as it almost feels like my contributions to the household are supporting him smoking weed and ruining his life. He is a very angry, depressed person. It makes me really sad to be honest, I barely ever see him smile. He'll come home and won't say hello, he'll slam doors. He doesn't really have a relationship with any of us, he won't join us for meals out or anything. He refuses to go on antidepressants as he doesn't believe in them... I'm on antidepressants and it's made a world of difference to me and I know they would help him.
For context, both him and I had a difficult childhood. Our father is narcissistic and we have a disabled younger brother just a year younger than my brother, which means he didn't get as much attention growing up as he probably should have had.
I'm really worried about my brother but don't know what to do or suggest. I'm sorry if any of what I've written sounds like I'm judging my brother, I'm just at a loss of what to do