Hi all,
Just wanted to emotionally vent really. I feel rubbish....
I ended my Fwb arrangement today - it was a hard decision because I was emotionally involved but it ended up wrecking my head
He was very consistent with messaging for 3 months, then the dynamics changed about 4 days ago. He would always contact me of an evening and the next morning, being really enthusiastic - whilst I made the effort plenty of times, he was always the pursuer. Then all of a sudden I felt a change (gut feeling I suppose). It was me now reaching out to him the last 4 days. I knew him well enough to know it wasn't like him. I literally felt sick most of the weekend and I hated the feeling. He wasn't away on holiday or anything, as he said last week he has no plans.
Not only that but this in partie was a huge contributing factor - it had been over a couple of weeks since we hooked up (had a great time, stayed in an Airbnb and it was just lovely - lots of affection and very emotionally intimate). He was all for spending two hours every night talking dirty but I was getting frustrated, if you know what I mean. So it came about discussing our next meet up, and I suggested next weekend (I knew we were both free as he told me last week). He asked if I was going to be still on my period (without going into detail...).Basically, I didn't get an enthusiastic 'yes sounds great', or 'aw I'm sorry I can't but can do this date?'. He blew me off. That was a painful rejection.
So having sense the last few days he was losing interest (pursuing me that is - he'd still respond to my texts), I just felt sick and knew I couldnt handle this casual arrangement anymore. It felt like it was becoming more on his terms.
So I sent this text to him earlier :
Hey, hope you're ok? Listen I'm going to have to bow out of this arrangement graciously 😊. I thought I could handle casual but, not this sort of casual lol. No change on my part - i don't want anything serious - but last few days I've felt the dynamic change slightly. I also thought it would be effortless asking to hook up and get an enthusiastic 'yes'. It was naive of me really to think that the daily interest yohve shown for a few months wouldn't wane at some point. I'm not cut out for something that's more on the other person's terms. It's all good though no hard feelings. x
Then he blocked me.
Was that text insensitive as I feel bad now that I forgot to say 'sorry' 😔