DP having a breakdown please help

[Ermbj]

My DP went from a stable decent job to having a total breakdown. He cannot function, he is unkind, passive aggressive, withdrawn. Mental health services are supporting him and his work is aware. He likely won’t work full time for a while and will need huge support on days he does manage to go in. Obviously that won’t last forever. He has days where he shuts off entirely and I’m not sure he recognises me or at least seems to despise me. No family around for him so I have no support with this other than the mental health team working with him. He might have to stay elsewhere for a while if he doesn’t improve and I don’t know how long that would be for.

I am a few weeks from birth and feel overwhelmed. He doesn’t acknowledge the baby at all. I feel all responsibility is on me. I don’t know how I will manage this alongside worrying about him. He hasn’t helped with anything at all for months now and certainly doesn’t look like he will be capable of anything after the birth. I feel like I’m drowning

What an awful time for something like that to happen.

What's he like usually/ before this?

I think he does need to move elsewhere asap. You are not in a position to support him and I think you would be able to claim some financial support as a single parent.
Are there any options for him to move out?
It will be very damaging for you and your baby living with him while he is in this state.

You poor thing. Can you let the mental health services that are supporting him know just how serious an impact this is having on you? Maybe you need to go nuclear on them and say you are splitting up and he has to move out?

Please speak to your midwife for advice.

I didn’t want to split up though, I’m just devastated this has happened. He was fine before, I guess a little selfish but nothing like this, this has obviously just hit him. I’ve been begging him to focus on the baby and us but he doesn’t seem to want to know :(

I didn't mean that you should actually spilt OP. It's just that the services supporting your partner might be more proactive if you make noises that he is about to become homeless.

They are so overstretched that they may not see him as a crisis case unless you really push. It's so not ideal but those who shot loudest often get more attention.

Also adopt the same approach with your midwife.

I'm so sorry, it's the last thing you want to be doing right now x

This.

How awful.
You need to protect yourself and the baby as a priority.