How to not feel alone as a single mum

[Chhesyte]

I’m pregnant and already feeling incredibly alone. Like the entire world is on my shoulders. I am worried all the time. I just think this will get worse, how do you navigate this feeling?

I have some family around but they have minimal interest and very hit and miss with support

For me, it helped by looking after myself. Eating healthy, good sleep. Prepare for your LO. Get everything ready. Organize. Make sure all your finances are sorted. These things made me feel secure, ready for anything life could throw at me. Im now starting to socilize, going out with other mums, coffee mornings. Getting myself out there.

I joined all sorts of apps like FROLO which is for single parents and mum apps like peanut and Mush
I also joined Meetup

I'm a solo mother by choice (IVF using a sperm donor), so I went into this knowing I'd be doing it all alone so to speak.

What is your work situation? Will you be on SMP or Maternity Allowance package? And how long are you taking your maternity leave for? Is your housing situation secure (enough)?

You will be very busy with the baby once it arrives, I was for at least the first 3 to 4 months. Having a baby is an enormous emotional and physical adjustment, nothing quite prepares you for it. It was very intense in the beginning and with broken up sleep, meeting new people I didn't know simply wasn't a priority because that took time and energy and effort I didn't have capacity for. Friends and family may or may not step up once the baby arrives, so right now assume that you will be 100% doing it all alone. Some may surprise you others disappoint you, but you will find your own rhythm with the baby eventually and things will get easier bit by bit as they get older.

Personally, I found the "baby/mummy" apps to be a waste of time, just a another platform to join/chat a little bit no real progress in terms of meeting up, forming a level of friendship etc. Everyone is busy with their babies etc and they'd prioritise real-life friends over randoms they'd met on the app. What seems to have worked best for me is attending local (free) playgroups run by the council, and I've made a new "mummy" friend from my baby swimming class (not free). Meeting people in real life when I felt ready and confident was a game changer in terms of socialising. I do keep in touch/meet up in person with my friends ore child too as there is a more established connection there which has nothing to do with being a parent. And when you go back to work, you may get the opportunity to socialise with your colleagues too.

I hope this helps a little Op @Chhesyte

Mighr be worth looking into pre natal depression, its a thing

Christ, not everyone who feels lonely/isolated suffers from pre natal depression

Single mum for 13 years.

I agree about doing the things that make you feel secure that other posters suggested but....
The early years do get lonely. Yes go to groups etc but honestly let yourself feel it, feeling lonely is not the worst thing and once you start using the time they are asleep positively (have a bath, watch a movie, catch up on chores) AND get used to be really comfortable in your own, it's honestly quite liberating.

I think moving beyond feeling lonely to feeling really happy on my own with my kid has stopped me making stupid compromises later.

And believe me those years pass quick, once they are more interactive and jabbering on you'll relish those peaceful moments.

I met my best friend in an app called peanut, our little boys are 3 months apart.

@Musttryharder2021 it's a perfectly valid suggestion that should be looked into if it is a possibility so support can be found if that is the cause (which is common). What's your problem?
I wasn't saying there are not other potential real issues she shouldn't be concerned about.