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Original poster

Help.

21 replies

emmaxo · 06/07/2022 14:01

So me and my partner stay in my house together with my daughter from a previous relationship the daughter we have together then his daughter from a previous relationship stays every weekend. So recently this week his daughter has said she doesn't want to come here so he says he's getting his own house to take her at the weekends I can't help but feeling bad for my daughter because where does she fit in to any of this any advice would be appreciated.

OP posts:
Pinkbonbon · 06/07/2022 14:23

Surely the bigger issue is that he is intending to be away weekends another place (or did u mean this? As in him not spending time with your kid)

I'd be very suspicious that he was actually buying a shag pad and using his daughter as an excuse. Or, gearing up to leave you.

Sorry but buying a new place doesn't make sense. Buying a bigger place with you, together where perhaps she has her own bathroom or something might. Then at least she could take a bit more space away from you and her sisters if need be. But his suggestion is completely ridiculous.

Is there any particular reason you didn't get married? Is he buying the new place by himself with his own money?

Original poster
emmaxo · 06/07/2022 15:40

Pinkbonbon · 06/07/2022 14:23

Surely the bigger issue is that he is intending to be away weekends another place (or did u mean this? As in him not spending time with your kid)

I'd be very suspicious that he was actually buying a shag pad and using his daughter as an excuse. Or, gearing up to leave you.

Sorry but buying a new place doesn't make sense. Buying a bigger place with you, together where perhaps she has her own bathroom or something might. Then at least she could take a bit more space away from you and her sisters if need be. But his suggestion is completely ridiculous.

Is there any particular reason you didn't get married? Is he buying the new place by himself with his own money?

He suggested he stays at mine during the week to see our daughter which is hardly anything as he works full time and suggesting going to his house at the weekend to see his other daughter. He's has applied for a council house as he is in no finical position to buy a house. We are engaged

OP posts:
PetersRabbitt · 06/07/2022 15:46

Just doesn’t sound right does it.

shag pad, or planning on leaving sounds more like it.

FayCarew · 06/07/2022 15:46

I'm sure that as a man who already has a home with his partner, and their child (and his partner's children) will not be a priority on the housing association list.

PetersRabbitt · 06/07/2022 15:47

He will never get a council house, she doesn’t even live with him.

BodenCardiganNot · 06/07/2022 15:49

You know he's on the verge of leaving you. I think you need to be clear about that and start to make plans. Are you working?

Bookworm20 · 06/07/2022 16:12

This makes no sense. I understand he is worrying about seeing his daughter, but what he is suggesting is seeing her exclusively every weekend and not seeing his DD he has with you?

how on earth does that make any sense. Surely the first thing would be to find out why his dd does not want to visit and address those issues.

It really does sound like its an excuse for him to move out. Or have a man pad every weekend to do what he pleases, as if the dd does not want to visit in his family home now, why would she want to visit in a different house.

How old is the dd? And what does she say the problem is?

Justcallmebebes · 06/07/2022 16:29

I'm not sure he will get a Council house just to live in at the weekends!! Why doesn't his DD want to come to yours at weekends? How old is she?

RedPlumbob · 06/07/2022 16:41

Don’t worry OP, he won’t get a council house. Not a chance in Hell. Even homeless families are being shoved into temp accom consisting of hotels etc for months on end. So he’s got no chance.

I do, however, suspect he is lying to you.

OnaBegonia · 06/07/2022 17:12

What are the reasons behind his DDs change in attitude?

Cameronnorrieisabitofalright · 06/07/2022 17:13

What does he plan to do before the council just hand him his keys??

Original poster
emmaxo · 06/07/2022 17:49

FayCarew · 06/07/2022 15:46

I'm sure that as a man who already has a home with his partner, and their child (and his partner's children) will not be a priority on the housing association list.

He's put in a homeless application saying he's homeless he phoned them and said he had split with me and had nowhere to go

OP posts:
OnaBegonia · 06/07/2022 18:06

Is he aware there's a housing crisis and he's lying to be housed, horrible man. There are genuinely homeless families living in grotty B&Bs for years and he thinks he's entitled to a house, because his daughter is to be pandered to.

Iamclearlyamug · 06/07/2022 18:09

He's put in a homeless application saying he's homeless he phoned them and said he had split with me and had nowhere to go

@emmaxo wow so he's lying about that too. Why are you with him?

RedPlumbob · 06/07/2022 18:13

emmaxo · 06/07/2022 17:49

He's put in a homeless application saying he's homeless he phoned them and said he had split with me and had nowhere to go

Show quote history

He will have to provide a LOT of evidence, which obviously he does not have. They don’t just take your word for it!

RubyandPearl · 06/07/2022 18:14

Well you can certainly put the council straight on the homeless front. I am absolutely sure that they will check on this anyway. And even then if his daughter doesn't live with him full time they will be unlikely and/or unable to rehouse him anywhere that his daughter would prefer to yours. I'm so sorry OP there are so many red flags here. Good luck x

Original poster
emmaxo · 06/07/2022 18:20

OnaBegonia · 06/07/2022 18:06

Is he aware there's a housing crisis and he's lying to be housed, horrible man. There are genuinely homeless families living in grotty B&Bs for years and he thinks he's entitled to a house, because his daughter is to be pandered to.

The thing is as well he just got a council house before we met and was obviously staying at mine so he racked up loads in debt and he abandoned the property.

OP posts:
Cameronnorrieisabitofalright · 06/07/2022 20:07

He won't get another imo.

Pinkbonbon · 06/07/2022 20:24

So he is a con artist too?
Why on earth do you want him to stay on your home then?

He clearly has absolutely no morals. You know who else has no morals (and lies compulsively and think they deserve special treatment) ? - psychopaths. If he isn't one then he is something similar. Normal people would never go to such lengths to con the system with no fear. Bloody good thing you haven't married him. He'll be after whats yours too.

He wants a new shag pad and he wants the council to cover it. He also may wants you to know how little he thinks of you. Hence moving out on weekends (that's if he isn't just planning on leaving). All part of keeping you down. Or perhaps a con to get something he wants from you (rushing the wedding maybe?). Not quite sure the extent of the fast one he is working but that shit is not normal.

He'd be out on his arse if it were me. Seriously op, he is dangerous. Repeating again- normal people wouldn't try to con the system like that.

Pattypatience · 06/07/2022 21:13

What planet is he on then? He wont get a council house anytime soon

OnaBegonia · 06/07/2022 23:25

He abandoned a council property and thinks they'll just allocate him
another?
What an arse, let him move out; tomorrow!

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